Oh god. I’m laughing too hard to explain what I’m laughing at. I’ll try. I’m invisioning my mom and dad driving down the road. Suddenly, mom says she needs to use the bathroom. They see a place where they can use a washroom, but all it is is a locked toilet. Mom’s happy. She gets …
Category Archives: news
Visible Stupidity
Just so no one else falls for this, next time you’re voting somewhere, the pen you’re using seems to have no ink, and the polling clerk tells you not to worry, it has invisible ink and the scanners will count it, don’t believe them and ask for another pen. We’re all good on that? Cool! …
Oompa, Loompa, Loompady Doo, I Am A Freakoid Coming For You
Huh? Why did she let him into her house at 3 in the morning if she never talked to him except online and he called with a strange request to sleep somewhere else? And…hoola hoops and hay? And…pink glitter? We’re developing a set of cases for the What the Fuck Department. bongo drum teddy bear …
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>Sticking Points
>I don’t know how I feel about this one. I’m completely and utterly torn. Juliana Cumbo worked to become an accupuncturist. She’s passed the board exams and has done tons of practical work. But the board of acupuncturists in Texas refuse to grant her a license. Why? She’s blind, so they’re scared that she won’t …
Junk Food
Would you buy sausages from a sausage cart set up at the dump? Why not just let the business dwindle…oh wait. people buy tattoos from door-to-door salesman with home-made instruments. I forgot.
I guess It Was His Time Then
What a strange story, complete with strange name. Sevan Kavorkian decided to hang himself. His girlfriend found him, cut him down and revived him. He started beating the everloving hell out of her, a man climbed through a window to save her, put Kavorkian in a sleeper hold, and this killed him. What a strange …
Life Insurance or Death Insurance
Does this creep you out? It sure reinforces two things: If something seems too good to be true, it probably is, and don’t sign anything in a hurry!
I’m Not A Scout, So I Don’t Need Honour.
I’ve learned two things from this story. 1. If you find yourself in Florida with the urge to steal money from someone, make sure you just don’t take it by force or directly from their hands. So if you can distract them, that envelope of girl scout cookie money is fair game. 2. There are …
We Will BE Beginning Our Descent Into Madness Shortly…
Picture this. You get on a plane in Toronto, bound for London, England. Things are all good, until you see someone being pinned down by crew-members near the galley of the plane. It’s the co-pilot! For unknown reasons, he just went insane, screaming that he wanted to speak to god. Thankfully, the plane was diverted …
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Eeewww! Get Away! You Might Give Me Cooties!
If you’re in court, and you find out you’re going before Judge Jon-Jo Douglas, you can hang your head and crry because he’s an ignorant prick. There is no better way to describe a judge who, once he found out a witness had HIV and Hepatitis C, freaked out, demanded he wear a mask, ordered …
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