Ya know, if ya steal a hummer from another state, that vehicle shouldn’t be your vehicle of choice to use to transport you to the welfare office to collect benefits.
Category Archives: news
Something Tells Me this Death-Defying Stunt Won’t Defy Death Too Much Longer
Hmmm. Is it a good idea to force a circus act to continue for another year just because the contract says so, when it involves one person firing a crossbow at another’s head if the shootee is the shooter’s recently estranged husband? I know the show must go on, but isn’t this a little too …
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He Was a Retired Teacher, Now He’s A Slave
What a way for someone to find out her husband was into S and M. He ends up in the hospital because it goes wrong, and a reporter tells her all the gory details. She did better than I would have done. Hopefully this guy’s x students don’t read the newspaper.
I Give A Vigourous Defense, And A Vigourous Handshake Too!
Somehow, I doubt ripping a prosecutor’s arm nearly out of its socket is going to win her over to your side of things.
Is The Nimrod A Thing Or A Person?
Note to self. If I ever end up on an oil rig near Scotland, I should never tell anyone about my wacky dreams. They might freak out and evacuate the place. That’s what happened when one woman had a dream about a bomb being on the platform. They went nuts, called in helicopters, reconnaissance crafts, …
Welcome To Wal-Mart. You Got Any Spare Change?
According to a recent survey conducted by police in Coos Bay, Oregon,the panhandlers that hang around outside of the local Wal-Mart make in a day what clerks inside make in a week. I’m not sure if I feel more shocked that this is allowed to happen in a so-called civilized society or guilty that I …
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Out, Demon, Out!
This story is just riddled with good stuff, so riddled that I’m having trouble forming a coherent thought. In the town of Poczernin, Poland, there is a priest named Andrzej Trojanowski wanting to set up an exorcism center. Exorcists say, and I quote, “Typical cases include people who turn away from the church and embrace …
Motel Sit. We’ll Leave The Light On For Ya.
They never mention in this story how expensive a stay in a PetSmart Pets Hotel is. What is the funniest part of this story? Is it the fact that TV’s in all the rooms are tuned to Animal Planet? Is it that they serve the dogs dairy-free yogourt? No, that’s disturbing, because what is dairy-free …
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>My Name Is What?
>Hey there Paul Sidebottom! When the opportunity is there to withhold your name, like when you’re the victim of sexual harassment, you might wanna take it, especially with a name like Paul Sidebottom.
>TV? Check. Pants? Doh!
>Here’s a note for the droopy drawers bandit. Maybe, instead of stealing TV’s, he should steal some pants.