There isn’t much in the way of details here, but I don’t know how many we really need. The only thing to remember is that if you’re going to place a screaming call to 911, there had better be something more important going on than my toilet is broken. St. Thomas police say a 911 …
Category Archives: that was dumb
Jail Trail
I suppose this is how the story would have gone if Hansel and Gretel were Drug trafficking morons. They were smart enough to plan their daring robbery in advance, but then…oh then. The men and another accomplice robbed a CVS in Clearwater about 5 a.m. on New Year’s Day, waving guns at employees and binding …
Alright Boys, Throw The Book AT Him
As a thief, your job is to take things with you, not leave them behind. This becomes especially important when the thing left behind is a notebook with a bunch of incriminating evidence and identifying information in it. Robert Shull Goddard, 49, allegedly broke into a house in the Hillwood neighborhood on Jan. 29 by …
Trains, NO Brains And Late Automobiles
There have been plenty of times when I’ve been worried about being late for a bus or a train. Thankfully I haven’t missed one yet, but it’s come close a couple of times and can get pretty tense. In a million years, though, I would not have thought of this as a solution. Being late …
Please Don’t Swing On The Hydro Lines, Say Officials To People They Think Might Somehow Understand Words
I’m not sure what the stupidest thing I’ve done while drunk is. Not because I’m usually too far gone to remember things like that, but because generally speaking I’m not the kind of person who does a lot that could be classified as seriously, terminally dumb. For instance, it’s rather unlikely that you’ll ever find …
I Can See Some ID. Please, Sir
It’s been a while since a fella has given the cops a false name even though his real one is tattooed on his body, but I’ve found another one. It’s one from a couple years back, but since when has that stopped us? Say hello to Matthew Bushman. Police were looking to speak to him …
I Think I Know The Answer To Most Of These Questions
What kind of person murders someone? What kind of person thoroughly documents himself murdering someone? What kind of person writes the word “homicide” on the media containing the thorough documentation of him murdering someone? What kind of person drops the media containing the thorough documentation of him murdering someone with the word “homicide” written on …
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Give Me All My Guns! I Have A…Uh-oh
This is a fairly run-of-the-mill sounding robbery story, aside from one detail. Surveillance video from the hotel shows a man wearing a shirt around his face and a University of Alabama sock hat enter the hotel with a gun and go behind the front desk. The clerk shows the suspect to the other side of …
Dirt Road Dirt Nap
I was a kid once. Sometimes me and my friends did some things that were…not so bright. Now and again one or more of us even got ourselves a little banged up in the process. But no matter what dumbass pastime we got up to, there was never anything included that could be considered, even …
I Deeply Apologize For This Impossible Accident
I’m not an expert on Ottawa’s municipal politics, but I feel fairly comfortable questioning the judgement of the city’s deputy mayor, George Darouze. He strikes me as the sort of guy who either is legitimately stupid or thinks that everyone else is. First things first, it’s never a good sign when even before you get …
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