What If Back In Black Was An Emo Song

I’m sure it would sound a little something like this, because everything around that time sounded like this. Dude nailed it.

I re-imagined ACDC’s Back in Black in the style of 2004-2007 emo bands! You know the ones, they had two singers, and neither of them could really sing, but you could tell they meant every word they sang? That, but AC/DC. Hope you enjoy it!

You Won’t Be Hearing About Our New Posts On Twitter Anymore

Judging by the stats this isn’t likely to mean much to most of you, but if you’re still one of those people who finds out that we’ve posted something by seeing a notification on Twitter, get ready to start not doing that.

I haven’t done a thing there since ol’ Numbnuts bought the place a couple years ago, so if I’m the only one of us you follow, nothing will change. You’ll either think the blog is dead and won’t be seeing this anyway, or you care enough to have actually put in the 30 seconds of effort required to figure out that it isn’t and none of this will matter.

Carin’s ghost of an account, however, has automatic posting set up and has been merrily tweeting things out in the meantime. It may still be doing it for all I know, but if it is, it won’t be for long.

DLVR.it, the service that handles the autoposting, has either ended or will be ending its free plan in the next few weeks depending on which of the emails we’ve recently received is correct. I can’t be arsed to sort it out, honestly. It either works or it doesn’t and there’s nothing we can do about it. What matters is that we’re not paying for a premium plan so that it will continue. Based on what we put into and get out of social media, it’s simply not worth it. It’s so not worth it that I’m not even planning on using the energy to figure out how to set up another free one. If one of you enterprising souls feels like doing it let me know and I’ll plug it, but for now, it’s gone.

If you still want to know when new posts hit the front page, we’ve got an RSS feed for that. There’s one for new comments, too. If you need an RSS reader, I suggest Thunderbird. Yes, the same Thunderbird that some of you might be using for email already. It’s got RSS built into it. I’ve been using it for about the last 15 years and it’s worked well. I love having my email and feeds in the same place. Makes life nice and simple.

If you don’t want to mess with all that, you’ve still got a web browser that should let you bookmark things. Do that to our homepage, then remember to check it every day or three. Anything new will always be right there for you to see.

We don’t have email notifications right now. Nobody said anything when I last asked about it, so I assumed it wasn’t important and didn’t bother setting up a new one.

If you’ happen to have thoughts on any of this, you can leave a comment or send one of us an email. Whatever you do, don’t tweet us. We won’t be seeing it.

Goldust Tells The Story Of Getting Tourette’s

Hey there, wrestling fans. Remember that time when Goldust got electrocuted and wound up having Tourette’s for a while? No? Good for you.

This was back in 2003, a couple years into the period where it had become abundantly clear that WWE had no competition left but desperately needed some.

If you’ve never seen one of these and are wondering how and why in the hell it made TV, don’t feel bad. We were doing the same thing at the time.

The answer to that question, you probably won’t be surprised to learn, is what the answer to that question pretty much always is. Vince McMahon is a weird dude. He heard that Dustin was doing it to make people laugh on the road and decided that’s good shit, pal!

Here’s Dustin Rhodes hilariously telling the whole story, minus the part about how and why it got dropped. I don’t remember the particulars, but I think it has the standard Vince era WWE answer as well. They just dropped it one day.

Raw Is Going Back To Two Hours Again, At Least For A While. Thank You, Lord!

I have been waiting for this day since 2012. It’s just a shame it has to start in October and not next week.

Even though the shows are orders of magnitude better now that Vince is outa here, three hours a week is too much. It’s especially too much when you’re expecting people to watch at least four more hours per week on top of it.

Please, don’t stop at 2024. Let’s keep this two hour train rolling right on into Netflix. I’ll beg if you’d like.

On the September 9 edition of WWE Raw, Joe Tessitore announced that Raw will be returning to a two hour format starting on October 7, 2024. WWE confirmed the announcement on social media and also noted that the change will last through the remainder of 2024.

Bell Lost A Court Case Over Shitty Customer Service, But It Won’t Matter

Man, do we ever feel this guy’s pain.

The case pertains to Gilles Tessier, a man who attempted to cancel his satellite TV plan way back in May 2019. At the time, Tessier was told in a phone call that service would be cancelled the next day, but noticed the following month that he had been charged up until mid-July.
Upon calling Bell back on July 2nd, Tessier spent around 75 minutes speaking to six different employees. In addition to being transferred multiple times and having to often repeat the same customer information and reason for his call, he was also hung up on at one point.
This all culminated in a 37-minute conversation in which there was “clearly a complete lack of understanding between the two callers.” As a result, Tessier was then transferred to Bell’s department responsible for new connections — clearly the exact opposite of what he’d been wanting to do — before being redirected one final time to the appropriate division.
Ultimately, Tessier was told the original May cancellation request was indeed in the company’s records, but it hadn’t, for whatever reason, been carried out.

Tessier wound up getting back the extra money he was billed, but still took Bell to court in search of compensation for the way he was treated during the process. He asked for $8000, an amount that, as someone who has had several of my own go rounds with Bell, I would describe as awfully nice of him.

The Judge found in his favour, but where I would have looked at $8000, said “that’s ridiculous” and then promptly doubled it at a minimum, Luc Huppé decided that a payment of only $1000 was appropriate.

Upon reviewing the case, Huppé determined that although Bell employees were likely acting in good faith based on their employer’s policies, this nonetheless made the process of cancellation service needlessly complicated and frustrating for Tessier.
“The fact the employees were continuously bouncing the call back and forth without resolving Mr. Tessier’s problem […] points to a dysfunction in the services offered,” said Huppé.

Citing the Civil Code of Quebec, Huppé concluded that service providers like Bell must ensure an easy contract cancellation process without imposing “an undue burden on them.”

I would argue that Bell’s employees doing what the boss tells them to isn’t the issue here. This isn’t a matter of whether or not the workers as individuals were acting in good faith, but whether or not Bell as a company is acting in bad faith by operating as it does. And it is, no question. It’s been that way for years. And if you’re going to tell them in a ruling that they really ought to finally fix their shit, the punishment needs to reflect that. Bell loves to cry poor, but they aren’t so poor that $1000 here or there when the very occasional person bothers to pursue the matter is going to change a thing about the way they do business. It’s better for the bottom line to string people along until they give up, and that’s all Bell cares about.

Faster Than A Speeding Gullet

South Yorkshire Police photos of Andrew Cross, Andrew Coy, Musfer Jabbar and Shabaz Ismail
Don’t call us late for dinner.

I imagine emptying out a gun shop is the sort of thing that would make a fella pretty hungry, but next time, maybe try holding those cravings until you and your rented car are a little further from the scene of the crime.

A gang who stole firearms from a gun shop were caught when one used his mobile phone to order a takeaway from the scene.
The four men have been jailed for their part in the raid at Hardy’s Gunsmiths in Sheffield on 3 April 2020.
Police said they were charged after a “meticulous” two-year investigation.
Andrew Cross, Andrew Coy and Shabaz Ismail, all from Sheffield, and Musfer Jabbar, of no fixed address, were sentenced at Sheffield Crown Court.
South Yorkshire Police said CCTV from the area showed Jabbar making a phone call, placing an order with a local takeaway for two lamb burger meals.
“This crucially placed them at the scene of the burglary,” a force spokesman said.

The CCTV footage also showed a distinct vehicle that turned out to have been rented by Coy.

Hopefully those lamb burgers were worth it, because they won’t be having them again any time soon.

  • Cross, 40, of Frog Walk, Sheffield, pleaded guilty to burglary, possession of firearm without a certificate and possession of a firearm when prohibited and was jailed for nine years.
  • Coy, 35, of Wood Road, Sheffield, pleaded guilty to burglary and possession of a firearm without a certificate and was jailed for five years and 10 months.
  • Ismail, 22, Glover Road, Sheffield, pleaded guilty to burglary, possession of a prohibited weapon, possession of a firearm without a certificate and other weapon and drug offences and was jailed for eight years and one month.
  • Jabbar, 22, was found guilty of burglary, possession of a firearm without a certificate and possession with intent to supply class A drugs and was jailed for nine years.

Even the shop owner had to pay a few hundred dollars in fines for not properly securing his business, so great work all around here.

Love Is Alive, By…Gwen Stefani?

I have no idea what the rest of this Judds tribute album sounds like, but the version of “Love Is Alive” that Blake Shelton and Gwen Stefani did for it is shockingly good. I don’t mean that disrespectfully. It’s just that it was kind of hard for me to imagine the girl from No Doubt perfectly singing a Judds song until I heard her do it. It’s always been obvious that she’s talented, but it’s just so different from what my old, out of touch self is used to hearing from her.