Plans could change, but right now I’m having my ass handed to me by some kind of cold/flu type thing so I’m not sure how much I’ll wind up posting today. To give you an idea of how bad things are, I had to fix no less than 8 typos in that last sentence, more …
Author Archives: Steve Wettlaufer
Pay No Attention To The Man In The Squad Car
HopefullyMercedes Greenwas trying to get herself arrested so she’d have a place to spend the night, because if not I’m left to wonder how she made it to age 19 being such a frightening level of stupid. Jenkins wore a suit and tie in an unmarked police car, according to his arrest affidavit. He said …
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If We Did This To The Brains Of The Bureaucrats I Bet We’d Find The Same Result, Too Small
Sweet Christ this is stupid. Tim Down sells fruit in a market. Recently he was subject to an inspection to make sure that everything was ok. It turned out that about 5000 of the kiwi fruits he was planning to sell didn’t meet European Union saleability standards. You might be thinking to yourself “good, I’m …
Canada Day Quiz
Since I spent my Canada Day outside drinking beer like any self-respecting resident of this country should have been I’m a day late on this one, but what the hell. It’s not like punctuality has ever meant much to us. This is the Maclean’s Canada Day Quiz,a test on which I scored 50%. Yes, I …
He’s Gonna Be Someone’s Prison Table
Arthur Price Jr., the picnic table molesting Ohio man wereported on back in Marchhas beensentencedto 6 months of…well…hard time. He pleaded no contest to charges of “disseminating harmful material to juveniles and public indecency” and is now a felon. I wish I had a snappy way to end this, but I’m coming up enpty. Feel …
The Samoan English Major?
I read a report the other day that WWE has plans to reveal that Umaga can speak English so that they can have him start cutting promos. My reaction to this news then is exactly the same as it is now. Why! The! Fuck! Would! You! Do! Something! So! Goddamn! Stupid!? Seriously, Umaga is one …
Out Of It
After a 5 year wait, Brad Sucks is finally ready to release his new album, Out of It. This news makes me very happy. In fact it makes me so happy that I’ve already pre-ordered myself a copy. If you’d like to do the same or even just get more info and hear a preview …
That’s So Redacted
It’s pretty frightening that anybody would trust a group like the American Family Association to deliver the daily news to begin with, and it gets even worse when you find out that they’ve gone so nuts as to start changing any and all references to the word gay to homosexual. Yes, that does indeed include …
Top 10 Strangest Anti-terrorism Patents
It’s been said that nothing is accomplished without a little bit of trial and error, and boy have I got some error for you people! This is a rundown of some of the stupidest anti-terrorism inventions to ever receive patents. There are some real gems in here, including… Passenger Control System During Flight U.S. Patent …
How Thoughtful!
I’m not sure why exactly this amuses me so, but it does. Police have recaptured a jail escapee who, in an apparent attempt to say sorry for slipping away on ya like that fellas,left a rose made out of toilet paper for one of the prison’s administrators. When Camacho-Mendoza escaped, he left behind a rose …