Somebody Tried To Eat Those Canned Hamburgers. Tried Being The Key Word Here

Many years ago, Carin discovered that there is such a thing as a cheeseburger in a can. She had basically the reaction that you’re probably having right now, especially if this is the first time you’ve heard the words cheeseburger in a can presented to you in the context of it being a thing that …

Save Money, Live If The Ancient Cereal Doesn’t Kill You

I have an urge to go through every cupboard in our house all of a sudden, not to mention a simultaneous urge to maybe never shop at Walmart again. I can’t quite put my finger on why either of these things might be. A Lakewood family bought a box of Quaker 100% Natural Granola cereal …

We Had To Go, And It Shows

Oh hey! A horrible flying story that involves neither midair gropey time nor United! Fun! Watch as Nicole Byer, who I will confess to never having heard of until this moment, tells Conan O’Brien about the time she found a nice big dump in her Delta blanket. Man, those first class people get all the …

Have A Giant Holiday Wrap-Up

Holy crap, it’s 2018. I feel like these holidays snuck up on us, then jumped on us, and now I’m still in disbelief that they’re over. In a small sense, they’re not quite over because I haven’t seen the nephews on my side of the family and we might see them this weekend, but everything …

You’re A Foul One, Mr. Stolen Package

Among many tips, police say that if you’re receiving packages on your porch, you should have a camera there to discourage porch pirates from stealing the packages. What I’d love is a camera inside a particular stolen package, a lovingly-wrapped box of especially-disgusting diapers. It seems Angie Boliek had one too many Christmas packages stolen, …

Simply Orange And A Few Other Surprises

Meet Willis Gene Burdette, who may or may not be Michael Kevin Lallana’s grandfather. If the two aren’t related, they’re at least spirit animals or something. The woman contacted police after her home security system recorded Burdette entering the residence one afternoon. Burdette, a criminal complaint noted, got into the home by “using a key …

Dog Poop Will Turn Your Roomba Into A Ruindba!

There’s a story going around Facebook that reminds me of something that happened to us when we had Trix that I somehow never put up here. Maybe it was waiting for its perfect moment. One day, on a whim, I bought Trix a new puzzle toy. The dog is supposed to roll the thing around …

Every Rule Has An Exception, The Breastfeeding Is A Wonderful Thing Edition

I’m a guy. For obvious reasons, I will never breastfeed a baby. Some may argue that this fact should disqualify me from talking about or judging anyone who might one day do so on the subject at all. But I know when something sounds creepy and weird, and this, this sounds creepy and weird. The …