Where’s My Remote Control

Would you call 911 if you lost your remote control? Someone did. Before we load up the shame cannon and rain scorn down upon this poor sap, I feel like we need the answer to a question that goes unanswered here. What was he stuck watching? If there’s an acceptable reason why the little buttons …

And The Award For New Dumbest Fraud That Apparently Actually Works Goes To…

I’m struggling to figure out how this scam works. Not because of its extreme level of sophistication or anything like that, but because try as I might, I can’t imagine a scenario in which even as a naive high school student I could manage to be this much of a maroon. City police fraud detectives …

I Bring This Stuff Everywhere. You Can Never Be Too Careful With So Many Thieves Around

Rare is the day when I actively hope that a person is homeless, but today is that day. Because if this woman wasn’t, what was she thinki…never mind. I really ought to know better than this by now. A 23-year-old Guelph woman has been charged after police say she brought several bags of stolen property …

Excellent! It’s The Not Getting Away Car, Right On Schedule

Old story is old, but ones like it rarely fail to amuse me to some degree and it’s been a slow couple of days round these parts, so here we are. LaSalle police had an easy arrest Monday at Windsor Crossings Premium Outlets after an alleged shoplifter mistakenly got into their unmarked police vehicle. Officers responded …

Stop The Time Changes Now, Neighbours Be Damned

Local MPP tables bill to end time changes in Ontario If you know me at all or have been reading for a while, you know this is an idea I can get behind. Not so much that you’ll find me voting PC in a couple years (let’s not get crazy here), but a good idea …

I Know What The Sign Says, But Please, Put Some Clothes On

Police in Summerland, B.C. are looking for a man who apparently saw the Full Frontal Trail sign and thought hey, there’s an idea. Summerland RCMP are investigating a report of a man hiking nude on the Full Frontal Trail of Mount Conkle. The man, reported to police on Sunday, Sept. 20, was seen hiking by …

Maybe Now You’ll Wear The Biggest Mask I’ve Ever Seen

I want my heart to go out to Donald Trump now that he has COVID-19, but my heart is not having it It seems this is the conversation a lot of people are having since the news came out about Trump’s COVID diagnosis. I look at it like this: The guy is a complete scuzbag …

You’re Still Weird If You Wear Two Different Colours, Though

Online shoe seller Zappos tests out selling 1 shoe at a time, not a pair The headline makes this sound strange, but it really isn’t. The idea is to better accommodate people with issues like amputations or different sized feet, which is pretty cool. It’s the sort of thing even I might use because of …

Reese’s Pieces

The Reese McGuire public masturbation case has been resolved. It actually wound up over the summer, but this is me we’re dealing with here and I’m not always the quickest at getting to these things. Toronto Blue Jays catcher Reese McGuire has pleaded no contest to a disorderly conduct charge — a second-degree misdemeanour — …