If I were to do a bunch of research, then decide to publish that research and hope for it to be taken seriously, I would strongly consider not putting my own name on it. At least that would be the plan if my name happened to beDr. William Malarkey.
Category Archives: news
Sometimes The Lawyer Jokes Write Themselves
This story rules for 2 reasons. 1.The Manitoba Bar Association says that it can’t afford to hire a lawyer,which is high comedy.2. The president of the Manitoba Bar Association is named Mike Law, which is also pretty great.
I Guess The Classes Aren’t Working
A 27-year-old man is facing up to 120 days worth of jail time after an incident that saw him assault a 59-year-old woman and hit a 63-year-old man with his anger management homework. Justin Boudin, 27, was on his way to an anger management class when he assaulted a 59-year-old woman at a bus stop. …
Duuuuuude. Look At The Size Of That Rock
A top academic says Moses was high on hallucinogenic drugs when he received the Ten Commandments from God. Maybe this explains the whole wandering around for years in the desert thing too.
How Much Is That Doggie In The OH MY DEAR GOD!!!
City government in Amsterdam has announced plans to allow both gay and straight couples to have sex in public at a place called the Vondelpark, which hosts over 10 million visitors each year. The plan has caused the outrage you would expect, but rather than coming from so-called morality crusaders like it would around here, …
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Now There’s A Hateful Kid
Something tells me that fifth-grader Tony Immediato may have some issues. I mean, we all might have strange fantasies about our school principal, but to say that you hope it snows and birds peck at him when he spends the night on the roof as a school spirit stunt to a newspaper reporter is kind …
Reason Number 2…No 4…No Make It 18 Why Our Legal System Needs An Overhaul
Our legal system absolutely baffles me sometimes. I could probably go on and on for days about all the reasons why, but today I’ll just stick to one that particularly gets on my nerves. I do not, and likely never will, understand the purpose of giving 2 for 1 credit during sentencing to people who …
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Maybe He Spent Too Long In The Spin Cycle
Ok Aron Pritchard. There are only two conclusions I can draw from this story. If you actually believe that putting toddlers in a dryer is a fun activity, then you are too stupid to be near anyone vulnerable. If you don’t, but expect we will, then you’re a lying sack of shit, and you’re also …
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Safe Text? Are You Serious?
Hey, buddy, over there walking down the sidewalk texting on your phone! Yeah, you! If you can’t see that post you’re about to smash your nose on because you’re texting, maybe the solution is to stop texting while you walk! It is not to put padding on posts and make a texting lane. Good god.
Sikh Cycle Carousel
Well, it looks like our Sikh motorcyclist who didn’t want to wear a helmet has been ordered to wear one. Good! What I don’t understand is if nothing can be worn over the turbin, why not put the helmet on and the turbin on over the helmet? Or maybe there’s a rule against that too.