Wow, Babelfish took a dignified set of questions and turned them, well, into Vogon poetry. A bunch of Israeli journalists were going to go over to Holland and attend a seminar on the Dutch political system. They were asked to send a list of their questions. The leader of the deligation was away on some …
Category Archives: that was dumb
What’s With Me and Gerbils Today?
Oh my god. I just talked to the stupidest person doing telemarketing in the universe. This story makes more sense if I can imitate this numbnut’s voice, but I’ll try to simulate it in writing. I pick up, and this voice says, “Hello. uh, um, Carin?” Damn me to hell for giving to charities over …
Which Is Lower, The Temperature Or Your IQ?
The Cool Cash lottery game has been pulled from stores in the UK after a number of complaints from angry customers whofailed to grasp how it worked. The game, unveiled late last month, required players to scratch off a window to reveal a temperature. If that temperature was lower than another figure shown on the …
Continue reading “Which Is Lower, The Temperature Or Your IQ?”
Spineless Robber May Have Less Of A Spine Now
Wow. I’m sure the robber in this story wasn’t expecting to be shot in the neck by a 75-year-old blind man. I’m wondering if the shooter was Carey McWilliams’ grandfather. I guess that blind man was a good shot. The shootee is in serious condition with a bullet lodged close to his spine and they …
Continue reading “Spineless Robber May Have Less Of A Spine Now”
Dumb, Dumber and Dumbest
Wow. This is just stupid. Not a single person in this story looks smart. Not a one. Lets’ begin, well, at the beginning. It all started in the town of Swanville, Maine, when an 18-year-old woman decided that the only way to get rid of those bastard fleas would be to shave the cat. Appalled …
Shall We Head To The Graveyard Of Bad Ideas?
I need somebody to explain thisAnti-Groping Applithing to me, because I’m just not getting it. Snip from the article, which is trying but failing: The application flashes increasingly threatening messages in bold print on the phone’s screen to show to the offender: “Excuse me, did you just grope me?” “Groping is a crime,” and finally, …
Continue reading “Shall We Head To The Graveyard Of Bad Ideas?”
Hammering The Point Home That He’s An Asshole.
Here’s a story for ya. 57-year-old Jayantibhai Patel was living with his father and caring for him. He was thinking of heading back to India and his father didn’t want to move with him. So he thought maybe this would be a good time to put dear old Dad in a nursing home. Unfortunately for …
Continue reading “Hammering The Point Home That He’s An Asshole.”
How Loud Was She Screaming At Her toilet?
If you live in Scranton, Pa. Next time you want to move to a new place to live, a good question to ask is “How thin are the walls?” Another one would be “are their any prickish cops living near me?” If they’re too thin and the answer to question no. 2 is yes, you …
Continue reading “How Loud Was She Screaming At Her toilet?”
Pedo The Clown
People really seem to be banking on the fact that the collective IQ is going down. Paul Carlock, who has spent 20 years in law-enforcement and who now works as a clown, came back from the Philippines. Since he said he was visiting an orphanage, and the Philippines is considered a high-risk area for getting …
Did Dr. Mom Get her Medical License Out Of A Box Of Crackerjacks?
The U.S. has recalled a whole bunch of cough medicines designed for kids under 2. Why? Is it because they have some toxic chemical in them? No. Is it because a study found out some unexpected side-effect happens when kids take them? No. It’s because parents don’t know what they’re doing, so they give their …
Continue reading “Did Dr. Mom Get her Medical License Out Of A Box Of Crackerjacks?”