Please, Stop Thinking Of The Children

ISPs agree to block access to child porn sites, newsgroups

Internet service providers Verizon Communications, Sprint Nextel, and Time Warner Cable have agreed to block Internet newsgroups and Web sites nationwide that disseminate child pornography, The New York Times reported Monday.

The move–part of an agreement with New York Attorney General Andrew Cuomo expected to be announced Tuesday–will affect customers across the country, the newspaper reported. Negotiations are reportedly continuing with other ISPs.

Part of the plan is to shut down access to Usenet newsgroups known to traffic such images, as well as Web sites that host child pornography.

Good job guys. Way to drive the criminals underground. For the life of me I can’t understand how nobody has figured out that any system like this is only going to create problems for the dumbest of the dumb. Anybody who’s serious about his porn and has a couple of brain cells to rub together will figure out how to access it. Routing internet traffic through an anonymous proxy server or cruising the town for unsecured wireless connections are 2 ways that spring immediately to mind. the wireless method is particularly worrisome because not only does it help shield the real criminals, but it makes criminals out of people who aren’t.

Another issue to consider is who’s in charge of determining what is and is not child porn. How can we be sure they don’t have an agenda that will do more harm than good to the internet? There’s also the matter of how people’s internet usage is being monitored. How much information is being gathered up and passed around,and where is it going? And if I may go back to the problem of making criminals out of innocent people, what happens if somebody stumbles on to a blocked site by accident? Is he hauled before the courts and forced to defend himself because of a botched Google search?

This is just the latest useless idea in a long line of poorly thought out government initiatives designed to win support from people who don’t know any better. It won’t stop any crime and it won’t save any kids. What it will do is allow the governments of the world to get another step closer to their ultimate goal of monitoring every aspect of our lives. Anybody who expects anything else is living in denial.

I See Disaster On The Horizon, But Not The One You Think

Wow. Here’s an attempt at identity theft if I ever saw one. For those who think the rapture is coming, and they will be swept up to heaven, there’s a site who will send a farewell message to their non-believing pals 6 days after the rapture has happened. But that’s not all. We’ve seen that before. This time, the company is asking for 40 bucks a year, and for that bargain, you can encrypt all your personal data, such as bank accounts, social security numbers, etc. to be sent to 12 people after the big day.

Anybody see a problem with that? Hmmm? I sure do. Aside from the usual questions of why would you care what happens to your stuff if the world is going straight to hell, and if all the good folks are being shot straight to heaven, why would you give all your stuff to an evil person, I see a company getting access to all kinds of data that they could use for less than good purposes.

Apparently, the YouveBeenLeftBehind.com site looks like crap, and their privacy policy is less than inspiring. It is one sentence. “We won’t give any information to anyone, period!”

Hmmm. So, by that logic, no messages will go out after the big day of reckoning? Nice going.

Here’s another curious part of their description of services.

We have set up a system to send documents by the email, to the addresses you provide, 6 days after the “Rapture” of the Church. This occurs when 3 of our 5 team members scattered around the U.S fail to log in over a 3 day period. Another 3 days are given to fail safe any false triggering of the system.

So…2 of the team members are believed to be sinning sacks of shit? Would those be the ones running out and copying down all the subscribers’ info to commit mass identity theft? And, what’s with the phrase “by the email?” Not via email, or through email, or by the email system? By the email? Time to go back to English class, sparky.

Let’s face it. If the rapture ever happens, your stuff is probably screwed. It’s gone, destroyed in a massive disaster. Giving all that info to some unfortunate soul who’s still on the rubble heap of the earth probably isn’t going to help you or them. On the other hand, putting all your important stuff in the hands of a company in the hopes that it will be useful to someone left after the supposed rapture is probably going to lead to disaster for you. Let’s hope this company is nothing more than a hoax. If it is a real company, I don’t want to see it develop a subscriber base because if it does, those people are doomed no matter what.

Those Evil Airlines Are Discriminating Against The Computer Illiterate

I’m no fan of the airline industry, but if the point of this tale of woe is that I’m supposed to feel sorry for this woman, well, all I can say is epic fale. That’s what happens when you don’t check your work before you hit the button. It’s not the company’s fault that you can neither type nor proofread. Hopefully bringing this story to the national media doesn’t result in you getting any kind of special treatment.

The Police Can’t Do Their Job If You Confess

I need somebody with more legal smarts than myself to help me make sense out of this one.

Corey Willis drove his SUV through a house the other night. He says his brakes failed, but no mechanical fault was found with them. He also admitted to police that he had been drinking earlier in the evening, Yet for some reason his blood alcohol level was never tested. Police say that legally they couldn’t have given him a breath test because he had taken and passed 2 separate field sobriety checks. There was nothing they could do but give him a ticket and tell him to go home, according to Chief Ricky Watson.

“He was given two field sobriety tests on the scene, and he passed both of those tests. If you don’t have probable cause, you can’t give a Breathalyzer test,” he said. Other charges were discussed, Watson said, but speeding was the only one officers believed they could cite Willis for.

“We couldn’t get him for reckless driving. We didn’t feel he intentionally did that,” Watson said. “It’s not a popular thing, but we did all we feel we could do legally.”

Here’s what I can’t figure out. Whether Willis’s drinking did or did not cause him to lay waste to these people’s home, shouldn’t the fact that he told the cops yes I’ve been drinking today count as probable cause? Even if you might think it doesn’t, shouldn’t recording his blood alcohol level for the case report be a matter of standard procedure? And what does it matter if he passed the other tests? Just because somebody appears to be fine doesn’t mean he is. Speaking only for myself, there are things I can do pretty well when I’m hosed, but that doesn’t mean I’m safe to drive. Just because I can say the alphabet or walk around without falling over doesn’t mean I’m not a safety risk to myself and others.

I guess my major question is did these cops do the right thing? Would a judge honestly look at the facts as they’re presented
here
and throw out the case? I don’t see how such an outcome would be possible, but I’ve been wrong before.

How’d You Die?

Two men waiting at the Pearly Gates strike up a conversation.

“How’d you die?” the first man asks the second.

“I froze to death,” says the second.

“That’s awful,” says the first man. “How does it feel to freeze to death?”

“It’s very uncomfortable at first,” says the second man.  “You get the shakes, and you get pains in all your fingers and toes. But eventually, it’s a very calm way to go. You get numb and you kind of drift off, as if you’re sleeping. How about you, how did you die?”

“I had a heart attack,” says the first man. “You see, I knew my wife was cheating on me, so one day I showed up at home unexpectedly. I ran up to the bedroom, and found her alone, knitting. I ran down to the basement, but no one was hiding there, either. I ran up to the second floor, but no one was hiding there either. I ran as fast as I could to the attic, and just as I got there, I had a massive heart attack and died.”

The second man shakes his head. “That’s so ironic,” he says.

“What do you mean?” asks the first man.

“If you had only stopped to look in the freezer, we’d both still be alive.”

Howard The Doc

Howard had felt guilty all day long. No matter how much he tried to forget about what he had done, he couldn’t. The guilt and sense of shame was overwhelming.

But every once in awhile he heard a soothing voice inside his head trying to reassure him:

“Howard, don’t worry about it. You’re not the first doctor to sleep with one of your patients and you won’t be the last. And, you’re single. So just let it go.”

But invariably another voice would bring him back to reality:

“Howard, you’re a veterinarian…………”

I’m Gonna Be Rich!…If I Go For This About 10000000 Times

I hate to be so harsh, but any person who falls for
this
quite simply needs to be killed for the good of the planet. Ok, you caught me, I don’t actually hate to be that harsh.

Date: Sat, 7 Jun 2008 21:13:57 +0200
From: peterwong2@tiscali.cz
Subject: Att
To: undisclosed-recipients

I am peter-wong from Bank hang seng hong kong, I have a late client funds of $8 USD in my bank and i need you to front as beneficiary,if interested contact me for more details on Email:pwong47@yahoo.com.hk

Sincerely, Mr.p-wong.

If we learn nothing else from this, at least we know why these things are called Nigerian scams and not Hong Kong scams.

Beer: Breakfast Of Champions

This is the best news I’ve heard all day. Hell, it could wind up being the best news I hear all year.

Drinking alcohol is not only good for the heart – it is good for the joints too. A regular tipple cuts the risk of rheumatoid arthritis by up to 50 percent – and the more you drink, the greater the protective effect.

I love this study because it doesn’t offer stupid advice. You know, stuff like the health benefits only apply when alcohol is used in moderation. What kind of sissy crap is that?

I’m glad somebody finally got it right. You see, what the uneducated like to call binge drinking, enlightened folks like myself and these here scientists prefer to look at as long-term planning. Sometimes I just don’t have the time to drink a measured amount each day, so I take the initiative and get 3, even 4 weeks done in a couple of days. That way I know for sure I’ve got some health in the bank should something come up to keep me away from the pint-sized pharmacy for a little while. I was always told growing up that it never hurts to plan ahead. And trust me, when you’re doing this kind of planning, nothing hurts…at least not right away.