Gold Medal Ass Clowns

What’s wrong with this statement?

The national Olympic committees said others should stand up instead of athletes.

“Sports should not carry the burden,” said Togay Bayatli, president of the Turkish Olympic Committee.

“Our countries are doing business there. Everybody is going there,” Bayatli said, adding it was up to businessmen and politicians to take the initiative.

This, of course, is in reference to the idea of a boycott on the upcoming Olympics in China, and the answer to my question above, as should be obvious, is everything.

Why shouldn’t sports carry the burden? Just because it’s not as simple as passing the buck and being part of the problem while raking in billions of dollars?

And speaking of passing the buck, when has it ever been a good idea to leave such an important ethical decision to businessmen and politicians? Businessmen are among the greediest, most unscrupulous pieces of worthless shit on the planet, and many of our politicians are/were part of that culture. Saying that they should be the ones to start the ball rolling towards doing what’s right is akin to saying “why yes, I’m fine letting these NAMBLA folks watch my children, they seem like a fine influence.”

The choice to boycott the Olympics and for that matter China in general isn’t a matter of money or politics or even some guy who can throw a hammer really, really far. It’s a matter of right and wrong, more specifically human rights and government wrongs. It’s about standing up for your fellow man and showing some humanity rather than suckling from the teat of an emerging market because it makes sound financial sense. If, as stated
here,
sport is a tool of dialogue, why not get one started by making the Chinese ask “hey, where’d everybody go?”

Chris Benoit And Other People With Severe Brain Damage

Do you think Chris Benoit’s demotion to ECW led to his double-murder/suicide?  Top stars who ended up in ECW seemed to have treated the brand as an exit point from WWE, such as Kurt Angle and Big Show. Angle’s attitude backstage seemed to have gone down the toilet once he moved to ECW. Big Show also left the company after his ECW run. King Booker did a radio interview expressing displeasure in the revived brand, even though he was a SmackDown! wrestler.  Benoit was heavily rumored to end up on Raw from SmackDown! Instead, he moved to ECW. I would think Benoit was surprised with this sudden swerve. This was a man who commanded a lot of respect from the boys in the back and even from the fans. Did Benoit interpret the move to ECW as a sign of disrespect that he wasn’t used to? With the very negative aura surrounding the brand, is it possible that he snapped and unleashed his frustration onto his family? Would he and his family be alive today if he ended up on Raw as originally planned?

Believe it or not, what you just read was an actual question asked by what I assume is an actual human being in yesterday’s
PWInsiderXtra Q&A.
Seriously.

It’s no secret that I love my wrestling, and I freely admit to wasting way too much energy thinking about it at times. But as much as I make fun of myself for
living in a bubble,
there’s no way that I could ever, in my wildest imagination, even as a joke, come up with something so utterly twisted and retarded.

I never met Chris Benoit. Never had a conversation with the man. But to suggest that a booking decision in a worked business was the soul reason for his choice to end 3 lives is downright fucking insulting. Not only is it insulting to he and his family, but it’s insulting to good sense in general. Chris Benoit, because of the years of abuse he chose to put his body through, was a mentally disturbed individual. The mentally disturbed, though they try to hide it, will eventually find themselves unable to do so, sometimes with horrible consequences. That, unfortunately, is exactly what happened here. Nothing more, nothing less.

And while we’re on the subject of the mentally ill, I don’t know who asked this question. Only the folks at PWInsider know for sure, and in this case that’s probably for the best. But whoever you are and wherever you are, next time you feel the need to say anything about anything, please, for the love of God just keep your mouth shut. Folks like you are the reason why the rest of the world, by and large, has such a low opinion of wrestling fans. You’d do well to step away from the tapes and the internet for a spell and investigate something called the real world. It’ll be strange at first because it doesn’t always revolve around angles and swerves, but give it time, you’ll get used to it. And maybe, just maybe, you’ll realize in the process how stupid you made yourself look yesterday. Perhaps not, but I can dream.

You Still Have To Wait, Now You Just Wait Outside

Here’s another reason you should not go to Britain. If you get sick enough to warrant a trip to the ER by ambulance, there is no priority system that says patience arriving via ambulance jump the queue, and if hospital staff don’t believe they can see you within four hours, as required by law, you will be kept outside in the ambulance, sometimes for an hour, so the clock doesn’t start ticking.

What? In what world does that even make sense? If you come to the hospital by ambulance, you’re in need of care ASAP. You might be having a heart attack or stroke or seizure or other event where time is of the essence. But 43000 patients were told to please wait, and please wait in an ambulance that might be needed to pick up other people…to add them to the line.

Hmmm. If Britain is anywhere as lawsuit-happy as the states, the hospitals had better get ready for trouble.

American Airlines: Something Special In The Hair

Yuck! Imagine getting settled in your seat on a plane, going to sleep and waking up to find that the man sitting next to you is masturbating and has jacked in your hair! Ug! Fucking disgusting! I don’t know if I’d sue American Airlines, the airline with which she was flying, unless I knew for sure that they saw it happening and didn’t do anything, but I hope the jackoff, har har, gets a large punishment.

The Babs Journal: Day 3 (May 11, 2005)

Well, after she actually slept in my room, not on her dog bed I might add, but on the floor, she gave me a morning greeting of a sniff and a lick. We got up, I had a shower, we busied, don’t know if she actually busied, I fed her, she busied again, well I don’t know…then I got dressed etc.

And there lies the problem of free busy. How in the blue bloody hell are you supposed to know what your dog is doing if they’re out frolicking and peeing and pooping, and you’re not even out with them. You should feel their prancy dance on the end of the leash, even if you don’t touch their back or pick it up yourself at first! Dumb dumb dumb!

And then we came down for breakfast, and she was pretty damn good at breakfast I must say. Then we came back and I took her for a busy again. Then we had a big meeting in the lounge and we talked about obedience exercises. Grooming and obedience, those are two things we gotta do every day. don’t know if I can remember it all. Now we’re going out for another handle walk..and then lunch and then in the afternoon, we go out to the city on our first woofer puppy walk.

Holy crap. These days I have this constant headache. It must be a sign of brain strain.

Did I say yesterday that my hands have leash burn? Well my left hand sure does.

Well she’s having a real good snooze, groaning and moaning and sighing and sstuff. she’s quite the vocal puppy. growl groan moan. I wonder if she wants to go for a busy. Probably a good idea.

We went for a busy, a handle walk and I had to leave her here. She was so happy to see me. Oh it’s beautiful to have a reunion with my puppy.

In the handle walk I learned about what to do if she doesn’t go where I want her to go. We also had van practice. That’s interesting for sure. But she’s coming. Good little woof woof. Then I ttook her for another busy, and before that I got her some water because she was lapping at the empty bowl. Poor thirsty pooch. and now I’m just sorta sitting here with her as she snoozes and we wait for lunch. She’s such a good dog. Babs and I are gonna be best buds.

I tried. I really did. But the problem was I was trying too hard to be her best bud and not her boss. I really did love that dog, although she put me through the wringer.

Oh yeah, the first day back we’re going to have to go to the disability pension place to get the service dog allowance, and I have to remember to get her registered with the city of Guelph. Tags for my woof. I still have to get my train ticket fixed because I’m being driven back by mom and dad. Man the first grocery shop with her will be interesting. Oh she’s sitting here, so relaxed. So calm. So awesome. 20 minutes to lunch. I could eat a horse. I’m a hungry hungry hippo. I’m gonna miss all this babying. Have to remember to ask Tim about the grocery store, grad ceremony, that lump on her chest,

Stop the bus! Right there! That lump on her chest was the beginning of the end for us. If only I’d known.

it looks like she’s missing a boob, but what the hell do I know about lab boob structure? Candy, the pet dog I had as a kid always had like 6 boobs, 6 or 8 if ya count those other two lumpy bumpies on her chest. It looks like Babs only has 5. Weirdness.

It’s so cute to watch her get so excited when I grab her leash, it makes me think of that song misty takes me walking. God I sang that in like grade 3 in the festival.

How funny that I picked that song. That song is about a dog dragging you along when you take it for a walk. Foreshadowing, anyone?

Puppy was woofing in her sleep. Woofing and growling at some unseen enemy. That is the most adorable thing I’ve ever seen.
I get to go in like 5 minutes to lunch. mmmm…lunch. I’m a hungry mamma. I’m gonna go in a second. I’m just gonna let Sharon walk with Charity so we don’t collide. That’s her dog’s name. She got Charity, Tim got Willow, and Margery got Amy. Glad I didn’t get the name Charity. I wouldn’t mind Amy or Willow, but charity. eeewww. I said to her, as a joke, when she said she’d have to register her dog, it would be a registered charity, ha ha ha har har har.

I keep thinking I must be missing something. But I don’t think I am. Maybe I’ll start making my journey. journey to the feeding trough.

The afternoon was beautiful. I read part of my book while petting Babs. She lay there and moaned and groaned and slept like a log. I don’t think she got much sleep last night with my clock chiming on the hour. Silly clock. But anyway, after that we went on our first harness walk! Oh! that was the most amazing thing I’ve ever seen in my life. She was as good as gold! We walked past these guys on a bike and she didn’t even so much as flinch. She is oh so beautiful. Then I made her sit right plop right in front of a property with a barking dog on it, and she did! It took everything not to just bend down and hug her! We walked for a good half hour. It was the most amazing feeling. Sure instructor Tim still had one leash on her, but he didn’t have to do much. She’s awesome. Awesome I tell you.

She had the potential to be awesome, but only when instructor Tim was there. He had the leash on her for so long during training that I never felt truly like we were an independent team. More to come on that later.

I brought her back and we took her for a busy and then fed her and another busy and then we ate and had a little meeting about the classes to come. Lots and lots of walking. Fun fun.

Past self, um, duh! What else did you think you’d be doing at *guide dog* school?

Then I came here to write and she’s been good as gold. I gave her a good rubdown. That was fun. She just loves it and I wanted to give her the best one possible after she’d been such a doll. Well I should probably take her back for a rest. Later dudes.

Maybe She Didn’t Want Her Boyfriend To Squeeze The Charmin

Well, we have an update about that woman who was found stuck to her john. I guess she wasn’t sitting on the throne for the whole two years, but she was in the bathroom that long. She had been sitting on the toilet for a month. Now, the burning question of how her boyfriend managed to take leaks and such while she was hogging the facilities for two years has been answered. They had a second bathroom. But most shocking of all is that I missed one very funny detail in the first story. A sheriff who found her stuck to the toilet had the last name of Whipple. He’s Mr. Whipple, like the Mr. Whipple in the “don’t squeeze the Charmin” commercials! How funny is that?

Any way you look at it, both stories make the point clear that these two people are very, very screwed up folk.

Excuse Me. Can You Point Me In The Direction Of The Reaper?

This story about an assisted suicide facility in Switzerland moving in next to a brothel is a little quirky, but this statement jumped out at me.

The only problem ever is that Dignitas (the assisted suicide centre) doesn’t advertise its presence – and a lot of people get lost and have to ask for directions.

I know that in Switzerland, assisted suicide is legal. But if I were living there, and someone asked me to point them in the direction of the help me cash in my chips hut, especially if the person didn’t appear to be dying or in severe pain, I’d have a lot of trouble telling them where it was. I’d have a much easier time telling them where the brothel was! I don’t know. If I did give them directions, I’d be wondering about them for the rest of the day, and their face would haunt me for a lot longer. I would wonder why they would want to die so badly that they would pay 5 grand to get someone to help them die. I just don’t think I could give them directions to their own death, even if it appeared to be their choice. At the very least, I’d just say I didn’t know where it was and get out of there.

If This Is Any indication, We’ll Need A Sex-offenders Against Animals Registry Soon.

Here are two cases of men who are lucky they don’t live in Scotland, because if they did, they’d be on the sex-offenders registry so fast, and they’d sure deserve it more than Ye old bike-humper.

There’s Joshua Coman of Kansas who likes canine ass, and was very fortunate that his victim, a rottweiler, didn’t fight back, which makes me wonder if she enjoyed it. I mean, I’m sure she could have made a meal of him if she didn’t. She’s a frickin rottweiler!

And then there’s this oddball from New Zealand who tried to screw a goat, but willy went limp. They didn’t reveal his name for the sake of his….do my eyes deceive me? Does that say wife? It does! So let me get this straight. He is married, and he’s still trying to get it on with woolly animals. What the hell? If he were in Scotland, I wonder if his name would be McGreggor.

They are very lucky they are where they are, because officials are still contemplating whether or not they should be registered as pervs, even though both of them seemed to have gone a lot further to earn the label than screwing a bike in the privacy of a hotel room.

I Guess She Had The Fucking Guts. It’s Me Who Lacks The Brain

We’ve all seen the scene on TV where someone has tried everything to persuade a suicidal person not to do it, and out of desperation, they try to snap them out of it. But if you’re going to try that in real life, for one, be sure you have things very much under control, and mmore importantly, don’t hand the suicidal person a loaded gun! This is an especially bad idea when the person is drunk and this loaded weapon belonged to the suicidal person’s late father whose death was contributing to her desire to die.

Most importantly of all, when the weapon misfires, do not, for the love of god, reload it! You already made a pretty risky move, and the fates were on your side. Now capitalize on that and don’t give her another chance! This calling her bluff thing sure isn’t working, and you know that now, so stop it!

Aside: Why does the fact that this man’s defense attorney’s name is Leonard Cohen amuse me? I keep thinking he’s going to write a song about this tragic tale.