He Should Have Just Said He Was At A Yard Sale

Last Updated on: 12th February 2017, 09:03 pm

The best word I can come upwith to describe this one is what the fuck?

Timothy J. Placko was stopped by police in Port St. Lucie, Florida, who noticed his van driving down a wooded trail Sunday night.

I don’t quite know how to describe what happened next, so some snips will have to do.

When the officer stopped him at about 8:10 p.m., Placko was looking at women’s sonograms that had been downloaded and printed from the Internet, the report states.

Placko told the officer he wanted to drive into the woods so he could call his girlfriend, but when he was asked the woman’s name, Placko said, “OK, I wasn’t trying to call anyone, I was just driving around.”

Police found a pocket knife on Placko, which he said he used for work, the report states.

When police searched his Chevy Astro van, they found four knives by his seat and an 18-inch machete.

After more searching, police found a film canister with 18 teeth, which Placko said were human, a blonde wig, a voice recorder, a pair of leather gloves, laser pointer, white rope and two spent 9 mm shell casings, according to the report.

Based on the appearance of the teeth, police do not believe they are human. However, the teeth will be sent to a crime lab for analysis, spokesman Officer Robert Vega said.

Detectives are also looking into why Placko was driving around with those items in his van.

Placko told police the items were gifts from his ex-girlfriend and that he found the teeth while rummaging through garbage.


I’ve gotten lots of gifts from girlfriends through the years, but none of them ever gave me sonograms and shell casings. Who knows, maybe that’s why things didn’t work out.

Placko was arrested and charged with carrying a concealed weapon, but the article doesn’t say whether or not he’s locked up right now, a pretty big omission as far as I’m concerned.

I can’t wait for the updates on this one. The truthful explanation of what happened here is going to be something I’m sure.

Full story is
if you feel like trying to make sense out of it.

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