Get Out, And Don’t Ever Let Me Catch You Snatching Children Here Again!

It’s amazing, considering all the time we spend chronicling people’s stupidity, that we still have the capacity to be occasionally astounded by it. Completely and utterly head-slappingly floored, in fact.

Albemarle County Police Department
Press Release

The Albemarle County Police Department is investigating an attempted abduction that occurred Saturday, November 24th 2012 between 2-2:30 p.m. at the Fashion Square Mall.

A two year old child was walking with her parents in the mall, near Central Court by Kay Jewelers.  A man came behind the child and picked her up from behind. The child’s father ran after the man and the suspect released the child. Mall security escorted the man off the property and he left the scene.

The suspect is described as a light skinned black male with glasses. He is approximately 6′ 3″ tall, weighing 220-235 pounds.

Anyone who observed this incident at the mall or who has information regarding the suspect, please call Crimestoppers at 434-977-4000.

Carter Johnson
Public Information Officer

No, you’re not reading that wrong. The crack security squad *did* take the guy outside and let him go home, and as the article linked above notes, *did not* bother calling the police. That responsibility fell to the child’s parents, and now here we are.

When contacted for comment following the incident, mall security had nothing to say. Wise move, since beyond “soup is yummy!” or “oooo, shiny!” I’m not sure what sort of insight they could offer.

Please, somebody tell me this is a firin’.

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