I can’t remember how long it’s been since we’ve reported on somebody gnoshing on a police car, but today we give a big ‘ol VC hello to Staci Anne Spence, who has just set the clock back to zero. The fun began when Spence, for reasons known only to her and possibly her victims, doused …
Category Archives: alcohol was a factor
If Eating Helps You Be Less Drunk, Then Eating This Here Paperwork Is A Good Idea, Right?
Nobody wants a DWI. But if you’re gonna get one you’re gonna get one, regardless of whether or not you succeed in your efforts to ingest the printout of your breathalyzer test results. An officer arrested him after suspecting he had been drinking. The officer brought Desormes to the state police barracks, where he was …
I Said Pick Me Up At The Bar, Not The Bars!
The Van Buren County sheriff’s department says a 39-year-old woman mistook the Van Buren County jail for the bar where she was trying to pick up her boyfriend. The department says Deputy Robert Miersma spotted the Hartford-area woman backing into the jail parking lot in Paw Paw about 2 a.m. Sunday and noticed she smelled …
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Wastin’ Away Again In Publix Grocery Store
If this were just a guy drunkenly riding a motorized cart around a grocery store smashing into people and things as he went, I probably wouldn’t post it because it’s not my job to chronicle every single thing that happens on an average Florida Friday. And for the most part, that’s exactly what’s going on …
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Not Sure This Is What They Had In Mind When They Sang “Get Your Motor Runnin’,” Miss
There’s not a whole lot to say about Karen Marie Dilworth here. Not sure if that says more about me, the blog or both. Karen Marie Dilworth was arrested by police at her Ormond Beach, Fla. home after neighbors allegedly saw her sitting atop her motorcycle in her garage, masturbating. Amongst the audience was a …
Get Out Of My House Or I’m Calling The Pigs!
Why wouldn’t a woman who allegedly used a pound of bacon on a stove top to drunkenly try burning her ex-boyfriend’s house down be sporting a name like Cameo Adawn Crispi? I mean, of course she would. Crispi began repeatedly texting and calling her ex-boyfriend from his house on March 14, according to charging documents. …
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Teacher+Booze+Class Time-Job =
This story on Kathleen Jardine, a math teacher now twice fired for drinking and being drunk in schools reads in spots like every joke about a drunken traffic stop you’ve ever heard. In this spot, to be specific. After a 911 caller reported a driver swerving in a school zone, police in Gilbert pulled Jardine …
Just A Drunk Ol’ Boy…
Were you to ask me what sort of person would do this, my answer would be either a drunk guy or a Floridian. In this case, I’d be right twice. Authorities say Travis Ryan Royal of Dunnellon was seen dragging a 48-inch, flat-screen television toward the front door of the Wal-Mart at 9570 SW State …
Jesus Take The Meal
One of the more creative dine and dashes I’ve seen comes out of Lawton, Oklahoma. Well, I guess it’s not as much a dine and dash as it is a dine and sit there hoping for the best, but you know. Police say Kristi Rhines ordered several alcoholic drinks and food at El Chico in …
Careful With That Flask, Eugene!
We haven’t talked about people leaving their kids unbuckled, but strapping in their beer for a while. I guess we’re due. Robert Eugene Mobley put a bottle of whiskey in the car-seat, put his two-year-old kid in the front seat beside him, and didn’t even bother to buckle him in. Mobley was already quite wabbly, …