Here, Take My Card. Oh, And My Shween

Lewdness incident at Vineland Public Library leads to arrest A library patron told officers she was sitting and reading a book on Monday when a man struck up a conversation and gave her a card identifying himself as Darell Jones. While chatting, the man reportedly moved closer to the woman and exposed himself, prompting her to move away and …

Bunch Of Yahoos

Wonders never cease. Doug Ford is out here insulting protesters and I agree with him. Ontario Premier Doug Ford slammed a group of people protesting coronavirus-related restrictions outside Queen’s Park on Saturday, calling them a “bunch of yahoos.” Dozens of protesters gathered outside of the legislature demanding an easing of restrictions that officials have implemented …

Did She Have To Dust Herself?

Let’s be clear. Groping somebody who does not wish to be groped is never a good or smart thing to do. But it is especially unsmart when the person in question is the fingerprint lady who happens to be booking you into jail. As Evans was being fingerprinted by technician Dena Pham, he allegedly “reached …

I’ll Swing For Ice Cream

Police don’t know who she is, but somewhere out there there is a woman who really, really likes chocolate ice cream. So much so that it’s worth spitting on folks and busting out windows when her eatery of choice has none available at 2:30 in the morning. Investigators say the woman went ballistic after Rally’s …

Hey Hey! Ho Ho! All Of Us Have Got To Go!

I totally understand being irritated by the constant noise, but I question the logic of using laxatives to *stop* incessant tooting. Angered by the noise coming from a union picket line across frome their home, an Ohio couple allegedly made sugar cookies spiked with a laxative and gave the baked goods to striking school employees, …

If You Need Something To Do, You Can Heat UP This Hot Dog

Serious question. Do pick-up techniques like those employed by Mustafa Demiray here ever actually work? I know that if I ever said anything to a woman to the effect of “hey, you’re bored, I’m bored, how’s about you lollipop my dong” it would be nothing but a ticket to the ICU to have the swelling …

Ahh What The Heck. I’m Already Here Anyway

I don’t know what other problems Casey Michael Lewis may have, but impulse control is clearly an issue for him. According to police, Casey Michael Lewis, 34, was booked into the St. Lucie County jail around 4 AM Thursday following his arrest at a Walmart for grand theft, a felony, and other charges. Lewis bonded …

Look On The Bright Side. You Did End UP Getting Screwed

The best thing about the story of Jon Omer Sengul isn’t that he called 911 to complain about a prostitution transaction gone awry, but rather that he seemed to know exactly what he was doing and didn’t much care. And yes, his name being Jon is also kind of fun. When contacted by police, Sengul …