Ok, first we had the police officer who jailed some poor McDonalds employee over a salty burger. Now we have an off-duty police officer whipping out his sidearm over incorrectly-seasoned deer jerky. Are people that nuts over food?
Grandma Got Run Over By A Reindeer? Nope, A Moose!
Please someone look at the pictures of this drunken Alaskan moose. Tell me. Are they as hillarious as the story sounds? Can you imagine a drunken moose? I’m still laughing about a moose tangled in Christmas lights eating fermented crab apples until he was drunk as a skunk, but he was a moose. And he’s a repeat offender, he’s been tagged!
Damn it I’m still Snickering. I must be easily amused.
Whatsky A Perfectsky Namesky
I have to do this, Steve, I’m scooping you. A dude brought a computer loaded with child porn to Circuit City and subsequently got busted. His name? Kenneth Sodomsky!
>Speaking Of Odd Studies…
>Oh my. There are some very, um, young at heart Scandinavian engineers out there. What a strange thing to research.
Damned If You Do, Damned If You Don’t.
Ok, this confuses me to no end. I’ve always thought that when someone is raped, she is dehumanized. But this paper tries to claim that the reason Israeli soldiers refrain from raping Palestinian women is because they think of them as not human. What the hell? It’s like the researcher is trying to call them bad for not raping women. And this apparently was a serious paper.
Smoking Hole?
I get the idea of getting around a smoking ban by cutting 3 holes in the wall so you can stick your head and hands outside, be technically smoking outside and still be in the bar, but I have two questions. Doesn’t it make it cold inside the bar? And doesn’t the smell and smoke filter back in?
Holy Imbecile Tender And Mild
I know I’m putting up a lot of Christmas stuff in January, but that’s what happens when you’ve just come out of dialupville, where you budget your time spent on the internet, and then you come home and have a party. But I give you, from Snopes.com, misheard Christmas Carols! Get ready to laugh, laugh, and laugh some more about how Good King wants his applesauce, and round John Virgin is radiating meat from thy holy place, and lots more. Maybe you’ll see one from your childhood. I saw a couple, but then again, I am the queen of misheard lyrics.
>Very Baaad, Very Very Baaaad!
>This story isn’t that special, a woman in Dibble, Oklahoma, got charged because her two goats were screwing and pooping and someone saw it, but there were two things that caught my attention. For one, it was in her own yard, and it was fensed, so what’s the big deal? And, if animals aren’t supposed to relieve themselves in public, what does a dog do when it goes for a walk in Dibble? There must be a lot of out of shape dogs in disgusting conditions in that town, or no dogs at all, because that’s just weird.
Everyone Else Can Have a Holly Jolly Christmas Except You.
Ug. Here we go again with the political correctness. There was a publication put out four times a year by a group of psychiatric patients at Cromwell House Mental Health Facility. They decided to copy that ten Christmas Carols for the “mentally disturbed” thing. We have a similar list up on the blog years ago. Anyway, they thought it would be fun to make a little joke in their own magazine, and why the hell not? It’s their fucking magazine.
Then, someone saw it who has a family member who has a mental illness, and she got all offended, and because of her being offended, they pulled it!
Why? I would be pissed if a group of psychiatrists put this out with no patients involved, but these were patients! If they found it funny, let ’em laugh! Why should their illness be always regarded with such seriousness? And why can’t people stand by their own words anymore?
Airbags Don’t Kill People, People Kill People
It’s gotta be bad when you’re not safe with your own son, and then you’re left for dead by EMT’s.
It’s never explained why this poor woman’s son hit a parked car and then drove into a bank, but what is explained is how her son was pulled from the car by emergency medical technicians, but they never bothered to check under the passenger’s side airbag, where she was. They just had the car towed, and then the next day the family said there were two relatives, not one, missing. That’s when the towing officials had a look in the car, and voila! There’s the missing woman! Now she’s not missing, she’s dead.
Emergency personnel are praying that the medical examiner says that she died instantly, so they didn’t leave her alive in the car overnight. Let’s hope, for the poor woman’s sake, that she died in the crash.