I thought I would put this up on the blog for fellow Guelphites with disabilities who may or may not read here. I found out about this at the last committee meeting I was at, but that was the day before taking the grey dog home, so I was kinda busy. This was published in …
Monthly Archives: January 2011
Planted In Jail
Look, Enson M. Ibanez, you’re an idiot. You were given a chance to save yourself. If you returned the planter you were in the middle of stealing, you would face no charges. Your response? ‘No. It’s too heavy.’ So, your list of charges is disorderly conduct, malicious destruction, and larceny. And all that could have …
There’s No Tellin’ Who Kilin Would Have Been Killin’.
After reading the story of a man flying down a section of highway marked closed just so he could catch his flight, I guess I can believe the stupidity isn’t just contained to this area. When sections of Highway 402 were closed due to snow, some numbnuts were moving road closed signs and barriers, so …
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Stop, Or I’ll Mute
Wow. I’ve seen a lot more robberies lately where the robber is just not cut out for this. A man came into a grocery store, pointted a gun and said this was a robbery. The owner of the store pointed a remote control at him and told him to leave, and he did! He ran …
The Books Got In The Way Of Getting A Good Education
I think this guy had better head back to school. Even though he was very proud of getting his GED, he hadn’t learned yet that it is never a good plan to hang the GED certificate above his meth-cooking rig. It’s also not good, when you’re discovered by cops, to run into the woods with …
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Class, Say Hello To Your New Teacher, Todd The T1000.
Yikes! My sister taught English for a time in South Korea. I wonder what she would think of the idea that they’ve started getting robots to teach the kids. The robots are remotely controled by teachers of English in the Philippines, because it’s cheaper to hire those teachers. But oh no, we’re not replacing English …
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Was He Trying To Apologize?
Hey Scott Johnson. For the love of Pete, if you’ve just tried and failed to rob a liquor store the night before, do not go back there to buy booze while wearing the same clothes, unless you want to get caught. You will, and you did.
I Suspect He Won’t Be Just A Suspect For Long
If you’re on surveillance footage robbing a store while your partner shoots the clerk dead, it’s probably not a good idea to come back to the store and tell a TV reporter how mad you are for being branded a suspect. You might as well just turn yourself in, because if the reporter’s any good, …
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Stay The Hell Off His Lawn. It’s Safer That Way
Remember the case of Joshua Funches getting shot because his tarrier peed on a guy’s lawn? Well, all the shooter got was four years of probation. Oh, because he’d had no prior contact with the law. So even if his first entry in his criminal record was murder, he still gets leniency? So there are …
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Lizards For Christmas!
Well, the new year isn’t starting off too well for poor Steve. He seems to have caught a doozer of a flu reminiscent of that bastard we both got a couple of years ago. Only this time, he got it first. Let’s hope I don’t get it, and if I do get it, let’s not …
