Today In Bad Excuses For Worse Things

  • The reason I have this cell phone taped to my shoe is that the pants I’m wearing have big pocket holes that it always falls through, so that’s just the easiest way to carry it. I was absolutely not taking upskirt videos, in spite of the fact that you seem to have found some.

    During an interview at the police station, Bass denied taking inappropriate photographs.
    “I accidentally bumped into the lady, apologized and moved on,” Bass told Talamo, according to court papers.
    Bass also referenced being confronted by the customer about possibly “upskirting” the victim, which he denied doing, Talamo reported.
    “The pants I had on have big holes in the pockets where my cellphone will fall through. I had no intentions of doing anything, or did anything, like that,” Bass told Talamo, according to court documents.
    Talamo confiscated Bass’ iPhone, which was analyzed by the state attorney general’s office after police obtained a search warrant. Agents discovered during the analysis a file labelled “Murrysville” that showed inappropriate photographs of a second woman, police said.
    Police said the Sept. 9 video file shows Bass manipulating the angle of the cellphone taped to his shoe in the store immediately before the inappropriate video was taken.

  • That young girl absolutely did not see me polishing the old gearshift in mom’s sports car. What she saw was me playing a small guitar, which looks like the same thing. An honest mistake, I’m sure.

    A now 16-year-old girl testified that as she walked past the car in St Jude’s Parade, south Belfast, “a man just caught my eye”.
    “His seat was completely rolled back and I could see his bottom half, which was naked,” she said.
    “He had his pants down and he was rubbing his penis.”

    Under cross-examination by a barrister representing Anderson, it was suggested to the schoolgirl that she had “put two and two together and come up with six”.
    The teenager rejected this suggestion and said: “I know what I saw and I saw the lower half of his body.
    “I saw his hand and I saw him masturbating. I know I saw that.”
    Anderson claimed he had parked on St Jude’s Parade that afternoon as he was hoping to meet a friend who was rehearsing for a production in the Lyric Theatre.
    He said he was wearing red shorts as he planned to go training, and when that didn’t happen he parked up and spoke to friends on his phone.
    He said he then got his Baby Taylor guitar from the boot, smoked a cigarette and got back into the BMW where he started playing the guitar.
    Anderson said that playing his guitar would have produced a “similar motion” to masturbation, but said: “The bottom line is that I know for a fact I was not exposed and I was not masturbating in my mother’s car on that day.”

Leave a comment

Your email address will not be published.

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.