On some level, I’m pretty sure I understand what Adriana Salas was thinking. If I were driving around in a stolen truck, it sure would be nice to know whether or not the cops knew that I was driving around in a stolen truck. But there’s wanting to know and being dedicated to finding out, …
Category Archives: news
Oh The Weather Outside Was Frightful, And To Thieves The Fates Were Spiteful
On the same morning within about 2 and a half hours of each other, two separate theft attempts in Abbotsford, B.C., were foiled by the weather. The snow, to be specific. The second and I think slightly less humourous of the two happened around 7:15 A.M. on the morning of February 7th (happy birthday, Carin!) …
Continue reading “Oh The Weather Outside Was Frightful, And To Thieves The Fates Were Spiteful”
You Shouldn’t Kill Animals! Let Me Do It Instead!
I’m about as far from vegan as it gets, but if you’re not, great. I’m also not one who tends to engage in public forms of protest all that often, but if you do, great. Everyone should do what they want to do and be what they want to be. But for the love of …
Continue reading “You Shouldn’t Kill Animals! Let Me Do It Instead!”
Sir, You’ve Got The Wrong Number. But Officer, You’ve Got The Wrong Idea
Jeff Lytle may or may not have just learned a very important lesson. I say may or may not because when you start off from a position of such overt yet preventable dipshittery, the capacity for learning is by no means guaranteed. The arrest came after Lytle tried to reach out to a hitman named …
Continue reading “Sir, You’ve Got The Wrong Number. But Officer, You’ve Got The Wrong Idea”
Happy National Your Jumpy Ass Just Got Popped For Drugs Day
Dear Nameless Criminal: Next time the police see you holding a popcorn maker box and playfully wish you a happy National Popcorn Day, try playing it cool. Chances are it would work out much better than the alternative. A man was spotted beside the street holding a popcorn maker box by officers on patrol. They …
Continue reading “Happy National Your Jumpy Ass Just Got Popped For Drugs Day”
United Breaks Pilots
Ok, so this broken seems to have been caused by life and the world in general, but this tag has a theme, in case you haven’t noticed. An unidentified United Airlines pilot caused a two hour delay and perhaps more than one bowel evacuation when she boarded a flight, grabbed the microphone and started chatting …
United Breaks Baggage Handlers
To be fair he was unharmed so I suppose they didn’t break him per se, but they certainly could have since while baggage is meant to fly in the cargo hold, the same isn’t generally true of its handlers. A baggage handler was locked inside an airplane’s cargo area during a 1.5-hour flight from North …
I Take On This Same Train Every Week
I saw this a few months ago but kept forgetting to post it…which is a terrible oversight since it has two themes we looove: people having close calls with trains, and the idea that something crazy happened to a person again, and it’s mentioned in the headline. It says here that at the beginning of …
The Trump Incident: Far More Worrisome Than The Sweden Incident
This post would have a perfect soundtrack if only it was available in a form I could embed. But since it’s not, go here and listen. It says it’s playable somewhere there, I couldn’t get it to play…but you could always go buy it. You can see by the lyrics why it fits so perfectly…except …
Continue reading “The Trump Incident: Far More Worrisome Than The Sweden Incident”
Today In Whatever You Say, Buddy: It’s Possible To Kiss A Kid By Accident Three Times. I Know Because I Did It
I’ve heard a lot of terrible excuses for things, and this one’s definitely way up there on that list. Former Houston substitute teacher Pete Garcia Hernandez, 49, has been charged with three counts of indecency with a child, which is why he is former Houston substitute teacher Pete Garcia Hernandez and not current Houston substitute …