Of all the sites on the internet, this is one.
Today in stupid ass reasons for calling 911: The pizza wasn’t ready when my son and I came to collect it. A 32-year-old woman dialled 911 at about 9 p.m. Monday to report her pizza wasn’t ready when she showed up at an Elgin, Ont., restaurant to pick it up, Leeds County OPP said. When …
Continue reading “Ask About Our 911 Minutes Or It’s Free Guarantee”
Bank robbery pretty clearly is not for Michael Gale Nash. Not only did he whip out the old write your hold-up note on a paper with your name and birthday written on the other side of it gimmick, but then he didn’t even bother running away once he got his money from a disproportionately frightened …
Continue reading “Put The Money In The Bag. I’ll Be Outside Double Checking, So Don’t Try Anything”
Recently, Donald Trump did something not at all unusual for him. He made a bad policy decision. This time it’s one that might start a global trade war, because that’s the sort of thing that tends to happen when you just up and decide one day that you’re slapping tariffs on steel and aluminum that …
Continue reading “Can It Be? Did Trump Try To Tell The Truth For The First Time?”
Points for being diligent I guess, but I sure hope these Fiat selling Floridians understand cars better than they seem to understand computers. Yeesh. https://twitter.com/MarciRobin/status/998030243981033472 The sales guy was handing me paper after paper with a brief explanation of what each one was for, and then he handed me that page — with literally nothing …
Continue reading “Of Course I’m Not A…Beepbeepboopboop…Crap!”
Name a word that follows the word pork seems like a pretty simple question. I thought of a good half dozen answers right away when I heard it. Not everyone is me, apparently. The woman who spells loin lion and whatever the hell a pork tease is supposed to be (pretty sure we all have …
Continue reading “So Here’s A Ridiculous Round Of Family Feud”
I’m not sure we’re quite hitting Brian Roberts clonks himself on the head and winds up with a concussion territory here, but respect to Red Sox pitcher Carson Smith for a solid effort. Carson Smith hurt his arm throwing his glove in the dugout after he left the game yesterday. "It's unfortunate," Dave Dombrowski said. …
Not sure who comes off looking worse here, honestly. Off-duty McDonald’s employee Phillip Bailey for chucking a smoothie at a 91-year-old man during a stupid drive thru argument, or Johnnie Douglas, the 91-year-old man in question, for reacting to the yogurt-based assault by returning fire with an actual gun. The Indiana McDonald’s altercation that later …
I hate saying this because generally speaking I don’t ever want to see bad things happen to people, but let’s be honest, some of them just fucking deserve it. Like, for instance, these nine idiots who opened mail that didn’t belong to them, found powder inside and then, thinking it might be cocaine, divvied it …
Continue reading “At Least They Won’t Have To Worry About Brain Damage”
Note to Xavier Moran: If you own one of those dashcams that records everything, there’s more than a slim chance that the word everything means exactly what you’d think it would. This is important, because not only will it have the good evidence on it that will prove you weren’t at fault in that car …
Continue reading “The Dashcam Giveth And The Dashcam Taketh Away”
Update: Somewhere between me hitting publish on this and going to the site to make double sure that I hadn’t messed anything up, the second Facebook post went from looking for him to noting that he was captured. Never underestimate the power of the Vomit Comet. Original post: Police in Georgia are looking for Kerry …