Ok, it’s time for a tale of…let’s spin the wheel of alliteration…milkshake misadventure. Yeah, that’ll do nicely. Today I give you the story of an unidentified 48-year old man who just wanted a cool, refreshing shake. To satisfy his craving, he decided to head to an area Dairy Queen drive-through and order one. Unfortunately, what …
Author Archives: Steve Wettlaufer
For The First Time In A While, It’s Stupid Joke Time!
You can thank Brad for these. You can also feel free to substitute the word thank for whatever you’d like. *Q: What’s the difference between a hormone and an enzyme?A: You can’t hear an enzyme. *A golf club walks into a local bar and asks the barman for a pint of beer, but the barman …
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Does This Mean I Can’t Make Fun Of Nickelback Anymore?
It probably doesn’t because they’re still Nickelback and haven’t put out something truly good in almost a decade now, but they’ve got a bit of competition in the wow, this is the same damn song category. In case you don’t remember the How You Remind Me Of Some Day song,this is how I remind you. …
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A Maple Leaf Milestone
Today is a good day. As of last night, the Leafs are no longer the dirt worst team in the NHL. That honour now belongs to the Carolina Hurricanes.Leafs 3, Hurricanes 2. It wasn’t the prettiest thing I’ve ever seen, but a win’s a win and I’ll take it. I’m not sure if this win …
Business 101 With WWE
Let’s play pretend for a second. You’re a company. You’re running 14 pay-per-view events per year. Each of these events costs $40. Year over year, your buyrates have been falling at a pretty significant rate. What do you do? Do you lower the price? do you cut the amount of shows you’re running to a …
Did One Of You Buy It?
Good news: the motorized not La-Z-Boy chair has been sold.Bad news: thanks tothe dumbshits working at La-Z-Boy headquarters who are alergic to free advertising,it only sold for$10099 instead of the $43500 it could have gone for. I guess it could have been worse, but still, what a kick in the nuts for no good reason.
The Story Of Fail Is Made Of Win
Am I the only one who can’t stop laughing at the term fail being dissected in such a technical, journalistic fashion in the New York Times? In a few years’ time, the use of fail as an interjection caught on to such an extent that particularly egregious objects of ridicule required an even stronger barb: …
All My Shootings Be Drive-Bys…On Myself
Here’s a hot tip for all of the aspiring drive-by shooters in the crowd.Remember to roll the window down first. Andrew J. Burwitz, 20, of Appleton, Wis., allegedly tried to do a drive-by shooting at the home of his ex-girlfriend’s family and another random house. Police found him because he failed to roll down his …
You’ve Got Bills, We’re Multiplyin’?
I know bill collectors can sometimes go to great lengths to get what they’re after,but this right here is a bit much. Not only did George Herron pull out the old I’ll make your debt disappear if you do something for me line while visiting a woman’s home to discuss a payment, but he then …
That’s Not Vandalism Officer, It’s A School Project
This is such a UK idea. Now kids, if you’re going to be running around spray painting everything,for the love of Pete at least let us teach you some proper technique! I’m really not sure I’m buying the official explanation for this, and I’m pretty sure anybody who is has never actually met a kid. …
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