Smart Dog? Dumb Master? Dumb Dog and Master?

A Doberman Pinscher named Victoria figured out that she could turn on a stove, and after one showing of this new trick causing a minor fire, her master didn’t fix it so Victoria couldn’t get to repeat it. Victoria repeated it while her master was gone. Now her apartment is gutted. Here’s a tip for …

What Year Is It Anyway?

Everybody keeps telling me that it’s 2006, but with all thistalk of microphone outfitted security cameras on public streets,I swear that it’s actually 1984. Seriously guys, you’re creeping me out here. And I know I know, you’re claiming that the microphones can’t pick up words because they’re up too high and you can’t zoom the …

What’s He Going To Do When They Make Another Movie?

Right now, somewhere in Britain, there is a man walking around named James Dr No From Russia With Love Goldfinger Thunderball You Only Live Twice On Her Majesty’s Secret Service Diamonds Are Forever Live And Let Die The Man With The Golden Gun The Spy Who Loved Me Moonraker For Your Eyes Only Octopussy A …

What the Fuck Department, You Have Your Work Cut Out For You!

Um…um…I don’t know what to say. *falls off chair onto flor, reaches up and hits paste.* When Colt Langstaff returned to his home in Cool, California, on Monday, the first thing he noticed was that his garden fence had been knocked down, there was an unfamiliar pickup truck parked on his drive, and his personal …