The weirdest thing happened to me the other night at the mall when I went out with my friend so we could buy Christmas presents for each other. I know it’s January, but we don’t live in the same town, and anyway, that really doesn’t have much to do with the story. So we’re walking …
Monthly Archives: January 2005
There’s Gotta Be A Better Way
Reno, Nev. – Police received a call for help from a 50-year-old Reno man who said he couldn’t stop bleeding from a self-castration operation. Police and paramedics responded to the call and took the man to the Washoe Medical Center. According to hospital officials, the man had administered a successful castration on himself thanks to …
The Gay Bomb?
I saw this article yesterday and ever since I’ve laughed every time I’ve thought about it. These are actual US military weapon ideas that people were trying to get actual funding to develop. I don’t know about you, but I feel safer already.
Dinner Rolls Are Too Big
So this guy goes to see his Doctor to complain about his erectile difficulty. He tells the Doctor that this isn’t a normal problem. It’s really really bad and none of the traditional pills or medicines has worked yet. Not even the world famous Viagary. He’s looking for something a bit more unconventional now. The …
You Guys Must Have Been Bored Yesterday!
Wow. You guys must have been bored yesterday. We had our highest hit count in a long long time. I can’t remember the last time it was that high. It’s been a few months at least. So thanks.
Goalball Tournament
If you don’t know what goalball is, you might as well skip this post. OBSA is organizing an age 23 and under goalball tournament to be held in early March. If you’re interested, under 23 and live in or near Ontario Canada you can either e-mail me or leave a comment on the board. If …
Please Continue To Hold
Being put on hold when I call somewhere bothers me. Not because while I’m sitting there I’m thinking about how an office full of people sitting around drinking coffee are laughing it up at the expense of all of the people on hold, I don’t have to think that, I know that’s what they’re doing, …
All Of This Has Happened, But Not Yet
It’s never too early for a year in review, so in that spirit, have a look atwhat happened in 2005.Hey, it seems like it’s on the up and up to me. Here’s one of my favourites. June 15 Scientists genetically engineer talking dolphin. Dolphin’s first words: “Haven’t you assholes cured cancer yet?”
If You Can’t Beat ’em, Join ’em
Since I spend so much time making fun of the stupid things other people do, it’s only fair that I point out my own when they happen, and I think one just did. Remember that email problem I posted about the other day? It’s been fixed because I’m smart, but from the looks of it …
Why Stealing Is Wrong, And Why Tobacco Might Not Be
A 26-year-old man’s first mistake was allegedly stealing a tractor-trailer rig that had been left unattended with the engine running, police say. His second blunder was mistaking the truck driver’s tobacco-spit cup for something refreshing, and taking a swig. The tale of alleged instant justice had its roots earlier Monday, the report said, when the …
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