If you’re at the point of shoplifting your new pants from Walmart, I think it’s safe to say that both your life and your mind have ended up in a pretty bad place. But that’s no excuse for leaving your old pants, complete with wallet and driver’s license, in the dressing room before running off. …
Monthly Archives: May 2011
I Dropped Some Candy In The Screening Line. Can You Help Me Find It, Little Boy?
I know the folks at the TSA don’t much care for being called gropers and child molesters, so if any of them who may be reading my words have a better adjective for this I’d love to hear it, strictly for entertainment and what balls (not in the literal sense) purposes. “You try to make …
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And Now, A Few Words From Boohoo Burke
Last week, when the election was over, the news was filled as it always is with reactions from winners and losers. Reporters caught up with various candidates to hear about what went right, what went wrong and what the future may hold. All of Guelph’s major candidates and even some of the fringe ones got …
Coming Soon: 92.9 The Grand
This is great news. More local media options that are honest to god local is exactly what the world needs. I look forward to tuning in, provided the signal can find its way to my house. Residents of Centre Wellington will have their own radio station ! Centre Wellington Community Radio Inc., has received notification …
There’s A Crack In Our Foundation Of Trust
Proving that people just never fucking learn, something similar to the case of Dexter White went downjust a few short months ago. In that case, Antonio Recinos called 911 and flagged down a police officer to complain that he had been shorted when purchasing $40 worth of cocaine. This time the problem was that $60 …
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Final Update On Everyone’s Favourite Burger King Smasher Upper
The story of Nekiva Hardy and her Burger King distruction is finally reaching its end…for now at least. Hardy, who we’ve written about here, here, here and here, plead no contest to a variety of charges and was sentenced to 45 days in jail. Since she’s already spent about a month in custody, she’ll be …
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Hey Hey! Ho Ho! Come On Rapist, Make That Throw!
I don’t recall either of us writing about this case before, perhaps because in a moment of foolishness on our parts, we figured that the girl winning would be a slam dunk. But of course, as happens so often when something makes perfect sense and there’s no other answer but the one you’d think there’d …
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Everything’s Gone, Gotta Carry On
You know how I said on Thursday that my computer was in the hospital? Well, according to the guy at the store, my hard drive is dead. Nothing is retrievable. Nothing can detect it. It makes grinding noises. He says it’s a paperweight. Crycrycrycrycry, gasp, crycrycrycrycry. As the full weight of this set in, I …
I Am Bombed, And I May Also Have A Bomb…Do With That What You Will
I can’t decide who the bigger fool is here. It’s either drunken Christian Boncorps, 61, who told airport staff that his name was Bin Laden and he had a bomb in his bag, or it’s the airport ticket/security agents who waited 40 minutes to call police, sent him through standard screening and then put his …
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No mountable Boot volume: That Can’t Be Good
Well here I am writing this from my phone. Why am I doing this? Because apparently yesterday my motherboard thought it was a good day to die. Not only did it cash in its chips, but it decided to commit murder suicide, taking my hard drive down with it. It's amazing what a couple of …
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