I’m not sure why exactly this amuses me so, but it does. Police have recaptured a jail escapee who, in an apparent attempt to say sorry for slipping away on ya like that fellas,left a rose made out of toilet paper for one of the prison’s administrators. When Camacho-Mendoza escaped, he left behind a rose …
Author Archives: Steve Wettlaufer
First The Top 40, Then The World!
Come here kids, we need to have a little chat. Yes, please sit down. I know a lot of you love your music. I’m completely down with that, because I do too. But if any of you little hooligans thinks for one second that the world is going to sit idly bye while you use …
It Has A Nice Ring To It
If you’re a registered San Francisco voter, please, for the love of God signthis petition! A group calling itself the Presidential Memorial Commission is trying to ghet a proposal on the ballot for November’s elections that would see one of the city’s sewage plants named after George W Bush. They say that a President who …
Toilet Trivia
It isn’t widely known, but the first toilet seat was invented by a Polish scientist in the 16th century. The invention was later modified by an Irish inventor who, seeing room for improvement, put a hole in it.
More Bad Days At The Office
Here’s another great collection ofscrew-ups from the news. If that link doesn’t work, try this one. There’s some good stuff in here. You might have to watch it a couple of times to catch everything. For blind people using JAWS, press the 0 button in the Flash movie to get it to play. Those of …
Congraduations
I want to take a quick moment to give a big thumbs up to my brother and sister who both graduated this month. My sister from college with all the qualifications one needs to get beaten up by the elderly, and my brother from high school right into a sweet job (see what I did …
Today’s Poorly Worded Headline
Justice minister to herald stronger enforcement of drug-impaired driving I think we all know what this is really about, but the headline makes it sound like the cops will be pulling you over to make sure that you’re sufficiently fucked up on something. Well, if the people Carin and I run into on an average …
That’s What He Gets For Littering
It’s not even 10 in the morning and I already feel like I can relax and start feeling better about myself. Why? Because I’m notthe 21-year-old dumbass from P.E.I. who fell out of a moving vehicle because it was oh so important that the empty beer bottle made it to the road. RCMP said the …
Glad He’s Got His Priorities Straight
From theSeacoastOnline Police Log. 9:04 p.m. — A South Street caller told police he heard a female scream but would not be available for follow-up calls because he was “getting in the bath tub with his wife.”
Great Moments In Laziness
I’ve just discovered the greatest invention since the beer launching fridge. Ladies and gentlemen, I give you the R/C Drinks Cooler! Specifically designed to expedite the delivery of cold lager to waiting mitts, this nifty battery-operated ice bucket is the ultimate in decadence for any self-respecting layabout. Simply fill it with ice, bung in the …
