I’m not sure I’ve ever eaten a hush puppy, so I don’t feel qualified to speak on whether they are something worth kicking a pregnant lady over should the option ever present itself. But I will say that if one hush puppy sounds good to you then two should probably be better especially with there …
Category Archives: news
It’s Daddy Daughter Day Down At The Courthouse
Yup, this’ll totally work. Won’t look suspicious at all. Daddy’s got you covered. According to the Washington County Sheriff’s Office, around 3:13 a.m. on Friday, Dec. 31, a deputy observed two vehicles traveling “unusually close together” on I-41 southbound near State Highway 33. The deputy noticed the lead driver was continuously swerving, driving half on …
Continue reading “It’s Daddy Daughter Day Down At The Courthouse”
And That’s Why It’s Called A Memorial Candle
Three intensive care patients in Ukraine have been killed in a hospital fire sparked by a candle lit to remember a recent Covid-19 death. Another four people are being treated for severe burns following the blaze in Kosiv, western Ukraine, on Tuesday. According to officials, it began when a candle was lit by a member …
Continue reading “And That’s Why It’s Called A Memorial Candle”
The Drunk Tank Was Cheaper, But Not Nearly As Roomy
I’m not sure I ever want to be this drunk. But staying in a hotel that could be mistaken for the Romanian presidential palace might be pretty ok. Police said the Irish citizen jumped over a fence and escaped from the Defence and Protection Service after breaking a window to get into the palace. The …
Continue reading “The Drunk Tank Was Cheaper, But Not Nearly As Roomy”
That’s Not Even My Dong, Man
Telling the police that you don’t own the shirt or pants or jacket you’re wearing that just so happen to be stuffed with weapons or drugs or whatever is highly suspect, but at least it’s the smallest bit plausible. It might even be true once every couple million times. Trying that with the two bags …
Microbe Brew
I would ask what kind of person would try drinking hand sanitizer to beat a breath test, but I think most of us know the answer. And if a few of us don’t, the circumstances will explain everything. Also, her last name seems appropriate. Nutter, from Beverley, admitted drink-driving and using a vehicle likely to …
All Jacked Up And NO Place To Go
If you’re going to steal a set of new tires, you could do worse than targeting a car dealership. Those places are, after all, a rich source of new tires. But it’s worth remembering that they also tend to be a rich source of security systems, which means that should your acquisition mission be successful, …
I’ll Be Right There, Officer. Just Dropping Off The Bail Money
Good idea: Ditching the money as quickly as possible after robbing a bank. Not so hot: Ditching the money by running outside and depositing it into your own account via the ATM attached to the building. State police arrested McRoberts Williams Saturday after they say he robbed the Wells Fargo on Old Capitol Trail at …
Continue reading “I’ll Be Right There, Officer. Just Dropping Off The Bail Money”
Good Luck In Life, Kid. I’d Say Break A Leg, But…
Reading this, my mind goes back and forth between two thoughts. As someone who grew up around my share of irresponsible drunks, I kind of hope this motherfucker never drives or sees his kid again. But the way that Canada and the U.S. treat these things, I imagine he’s already doing both regularly. As someone …
Continue reading “Good Luck In Life, Kid. I’d Say Break A Leg, But…”
The Best News Bloopers Of June, 2022
The news, like the cream, is topical. Back to you, Sebastian!