My Criminal Mind Is All I…Need to Get Locked Up Forever.

I really don’t know how to feel about this story. I’m completely conflicted. Michael Monyelle, 30, is being labeled as a sex predator, which means indefinite commitment. This is not for things he did, but for thoughts he has.

I get that they were deviant thoughts, and it was to do with children, so in that case I agree. But like his lawyer said, it’s going to make pedophiles and the like less likely to tell their probation officers about thoughts they’re having, so that may make them more likely to reoffend because they’re perhaps not getting counselling for the thoughts they’re having, or the probation officers may not have any warning that creepy Bill is thinking bad things about little Suzy before it’s too late, and creepy Bill would have struck again.

I guess, if they keep this ability to lock someone up for thoughts they have to child sex offenses, I can live with it, but I’m afraid it will spread to other crimes. What if someone was thinking about robbing a bank and told someone that. Would the police go grab him? Isn’t that a bit of a slippery slope?

It’s My Service Chihuahua! Really!

Ok, this pisses me off. In the states, the ADA has made it really easy for douchebags to bring their precious little pet fido wherever they please, and more and more douchebags are doing just that.

Why has it made it easy? The law states that a merchant cannot under any circumstances ask what tasks the dog performs for the handler because it might make the handler uncomfortable. Here’s a news flash, mr. uncomfortable handler. If you’re going to get a dog, when you come home, you’re going to have to deal with questions. That’s the nature of the beast, and the nature of having a beast, I guess. Even I get asked what exactly Trixie does for me, and it should be pretty obvious why I have her. If you have a psychiatric dog, you’re really going to be asked why you have a dog because there is no obvious physical reason why you have a dog with you. It sucks, but that’s just what you’re going to have to deal with. I hate to be so harsh, but if you don’t want extra attention, maybe you should have thought about that before you got a dog, because having a dog with you is going to bring it, and bring it bigtime!

The law also states that venders of vests and patches that say service dog, or issuers of assistance dog tags cannot ask the person to prove that this is a service dog. Why the hell not? Would you give out ID cards without making sure the person is who they say they are? My question is why are third party companies selling these things? If you get a dog from a school, you’ll have stuff the school gives you to identify the dog’s working status. I guess, if you can train a dog yourself, you need something to signify that the dog is working, but I think some kind of body should be set up to issue these things, not just some store.

So now, Joe Shmo who thinks it would be nice to bring Sparky with him everywhere he goes can get tags, vests, and patches and falsely claim that his dog is a service animal. Then, when it misbehaves, people wonder why these animals are given special privileges, and it hurts the ones who really need the dogs. Here’s another good one. In California, it is a crime to falsely claim your dog is a service animal. Great, but how does anyone enforce this? If no one can ask any questions, how do they figure it out?

I have no problem answering questions if a business owner asks me what my dog does. Why? I have proof that she is a service animal. I have an ID card from the school. I have a card from the Attorney General. I have a tag from the school. I can prove that she is trained. But all of this might not be worth anything if anyone can go out and get fake proof that their dog is a working dog.

Here’s another message for the Joe Shmo’s who want to bring their pet dog with them everywhere they go just for the hell of it. If your dog, or my guide dog, or anyone’s dog is unclean, puts others at risk, or is aggressive, the business owner can ask the dog to leave. So just because your dog got in under false pretenses doesn’t mean he gets to stay. Ug why do people want to take advantage of anything they can?

OU…CH!!!!

Every time I think about this story, I shiver, and I don’t even have balls. Here’s the short version. If you’re going to Oklahoma, don’t wander into a bar wearing a Texas University shirt, or, or…! Shivers again! You might leave in a lot of pain. At least that’s what happened to Brian Thomas.

After enduring a lot of verbal abuse from another guy in the bar, Allen Michael Beckett, he went to leave, and Beckett grabbed his crotch and wouldn’t let go until…there are those shivers again! Thomas heard his scrotum tear and felt blood run down his leg! Convulsive shivers! Now there’s…what exactly? An insane fan? A lot of pain? All of the above? Ug. I don’t know what else to say. I could talk about the more than 60 stitches that Thomas needed to…how did they put it…close the wound? Or maybe there’s the constant pain that Thomas says he’s in ever since. Um, no shit! Damn it, those shivers won’t stop!

Duck Hunt!

Wow! Who knew what I’m about to describe would be so cool? Remember Super Nintendo? Remember the gun? Remember Duck Hunt? No? Damn I feel old! Well, if you do, and you’re blind, you can play Duck Hunt again, only this time it’s on your computer!

Liam over at L-Works has created the computer game Duck Hunt. He grabbed all the sounds from the original game, complete with the dog who laughs at you when you miss a duck, the little bastard. I don’t know what’s so entertaining about that noise the duck makes when it falls down, but man, it’s satisfying. Every time I play this, I feel like I’m a kid again. I’m half waiting for my friend to ask me if I’m done playing yet, and wondering where the gun went.

Look Out Everyone, Now I’m Seeing A Red Mist!

I can’t speak. I’m too angry. In England, apparently, if you have “good character,” you can go ahead and clobber your wife without fear of going to jail. You can just compensate her with a few bucks because apparently the damage to your reputation is punishment enough. This guy said a red mist descended over him and that’s why he started beating on her as she lay in bed, then dragged her from bed, threw her to the floor, punched her 24 times and then fled the scene leaving her to crawl to a phone to call for help. And this is an acceptable excuse and makes it all better?

And it gets even worse. There have been other lenient judgments lately when it comes to domestic violence. Another man branded his wife with an iron because he didn’t like the way she ironed his shirts. Then maybe you should iron them yourself, asshole. He also slashed her because she forgot his lunch. And this guy got a fine and no jail time because of lack of a previous record. I don’t give a flying fuck if he served soup to the homeless for 20 years. AS soon as he started branding and slashing people, his record goes out the window and he goes to jail! No questions, no maybe’s, he goes to jail!

Are we going back in time? Do women not matter anymore? I’m starting to wonder if these judges beat their wives, and that’s why they see these crimes as not such a big deal.

Help Me Understand This One

This doesn’t make any sense. Not one bit. Apparently, a 72-year-old man was assisted off a plane in a wheelchair, and then just left by the curb for 3 days. And it wasn’t just any curb, it was a curb where people come to get cabs, etc.

Ok, I can see where someone could get forgotten by busy staff. Hell, it happens to me all the time on buses, trains, anywhere where I say I need a little help finding a destination and they get distracted. But that’s when you get someone else’s attention. You don’t just sit there whistling a happy tune, thinking dumb-dee-dumb-dee-dumb, they’ll come for me. You get the idea that they’ve forgotten, and you stand up, wave, catch someone’s attention, anything.

Even if this guy couldn’t yell for help or signal for help, which would be pretty unlikely, wouldn’t cabbies, airport personell, somebody, notice he’d been sitting there an awfully long time? He’d start to look like a fixture of the landscape, except this one had soiled himself.

Now the family is saying he suffered a stroke because of his time in the sun, or something to that effect, and the airport staff are as confused as I am. Hopefully someone can make this make sense somehow.

As Long As You Don’t Teach Them To Kill, We’re Cool.

I always thought that teachers were supposed to be role-models. Even outside the classroom, their behaviour was somewhat scrutinized. But according to a court in Montreal, this is no longer the case. Apparently, a teacher can be a convicted killer since that has nothing to do with the subject he’s teaching, which in this case was electronics. So, he cannot be fired when they find this little tidbit that he did not disclose, and he must be rehired.

I know this teacher was teaching adult students, but it still seems odd that a court is forcing the board to bring this guy back. Will this extend to teachers of kids? Whatever happened to police checks? And when was murder something that entered into a lesson plan anyway? Well, there was that case of that teacher who got his drafting class to write an essay on who they would kill and why, but that was a weird story. In any case, isn’t it a comforting thought that convicted killers can teach now?

Is There Anything A Lawyer Won’t Touch?

This is one of those times when the story speaks for itself and I need to add nothing, so here’s a snip.

South Carolina Inmate Hits Michael Vick With ‘$63,000,000,000 Billion Dollar’ Lawsuit Alleging Al Qaeda Ties

Embattled NFL quarterback Michael Vick, facing federal charges related to his alleged participation in dogfighting, has been hit with a “$63,000,000,000
billion dollar” lawsuit filed by a South Carolina inmate who alleges the Atlanta Falcons star stole his pit bulls and sold them on eBay to buy “missiles from Iran,” FOX News has learned.

Jonathan Lee Riches filed the handwritten complaint over “theft and abuse of my animals” on July 23 in the U.S. District Court in Richmond
, Va.

Riches alleges that Vick stole two white mixed pit bull dogs from his home in Holiday, Fla., and used them for dogfighting operations in Richmond, Va. The complaint goes on to allege that Vick sold the dogs on eBay and “used the proceeds to purchase missiles from the Iran government.”

The complaint also alleges that Vick would need those missiles because he pledged allegiance to Al Qaeda in February of this year.

“Michael Vick has to stop physically hurting my feelings and dashing my hopes,” Riches writes in the complaint.

Riches wants $63 billion dollars “backed by gold and silver “ delivered to the front gates to the Williamsburg Federal Correctional facility in South Carolina. Riches is an inmate at the facility serving out a wire fraud conviction.

Singin’ In The Uranium

Residents of a small town in the Okanagan Valley have been told not to worry their pretty little heads over the state of their local water supply, because according to Marty Willfong, the district’s general manager of development services, the unacceptably high levels of Uranium found in it
used to be safe until those dumbdumb poopoofaces at the government decided to change the standards 5 years ago,
so obviously those levels won’t actually hurt anybody now.

Unfortunately, nothing about whether or not this nitwit ever had anything to do with the water in Walkerton was mentioned in the original news article.

Pssst, Marty. come here for a second. No no, a little closer, I want to make sure you hear this really well. A few years ago it was acceptable to cover things in lead, asbestos was a fine building material, and drinking and driving wasn’t so much frowned upon as it was something that made you sorta cool in a way. None of those things are the case anymore, and in spite of what you might think, it’s not the fault of the standards as much as it is of the research that went into figuring out that these things were wrong and unsafe. Those pesky guidelines are just the resulting reaction.

And by the way, if those safety standards changed 5 years ago, you don’t have to figure out what to do “now”, you have to figure out what to do 5 years ago. Because if something happens to somebody as a result of your boneheaded attitude, it’s on your head, buddy boy.