As I read the story of Catherine Kieu and the penis she severed, my brain is split into two distinct thoughts. The first, as you can surely imagine, is OHFUCKOHFUCKOHFUCKOHFUCKOHFUCKOHFUCKOHFUCK OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW!!!!!!!! The second is how in the world did this woman get a grown man to willingly eat tofu, even if it was laced with …
Author Archives: Steve Wettlaufer
Well Done, America. Who Needs Sensible Gun Laws Anyway?
Update two: This is even more right than the satirical stuff. A Senate in the Gun Lobby’s Grip By GABRIELLE GIFFORDS Update: This also sounds about right. COURAGEOUS SENATORS STAND UP TO AMERICAN PEOPLE This sounds about right. Next Week’s School Shooting Victims Thank Senate For Failing To Pass Gun Bill I’m not what you’d …
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Yes Telus, Being Robbed Blind Is Awesome
Nearly without fail, anybody who hears about or has any experience with Canada’s Cellular phone industry comes away with the same impression. Good lord is it ever massively overpriced. It’s gotten so bad in comparison to pretty much anyplace else that the CRTC has finally started paying attention, holding hearings on the state of things. …
What Do Your Tweets Say About The Kind Of Person You Are?
Here’s something kind of fun to waste a few minutes on. Actually scratch that, I’m sure I could waste far more than a few minutes on AnalyzeWords punching people into this thing and seeing if it comes back with anything close to what I think of them. What does AnalyzeWords do? AnalyzeWords helps reveal your …
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Putting The Family In Family Dollar
Delaina Garling was banned from a Family Dollar store for shoplifting, but like any good criminal looking to set an example for future generations, she went back there anyway, and brought her 7-year-olds along. You probably won’t be surprised to learn that she was quickly recognized by an employee and asked to leave. You also …
White Donuts Will Turn You Black And Blue If You’re Not Careful
I love you, Florida. You always make this so easy on me. Police were called to the Walmart store on US 19 after Charles Cook’s girlfriend said he picked up a box of white powdered donuts and hit her in the face with it during an argument. During an interview with the responding deputy, Cook …
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Help Test Out Some New Audio CAPTCHAs
I haven’t done this yet, but if you’d like to help these folks out I’m sure they’d appreciate it. The aim of this experiment is to investigate the usability of a new type of audio CAPTCHA. CAPTCHAs are online tests that are used to distinguish between humans and computers. The experiment will take about five …
“Where’s Our Son?” “He’s Fine. I Sent Him Out To Play With Mike.”
Good: Your 2-year-old child is out in the yard on a lovely Sunday afternoon, happily playing and sipping on some lemonade. Not so good: Your 2-year-old child is found wandering down the road on a Sunday afternoon. He’s not wearing any shoes or socks and he’s got a bottle of hard lemonade in each hand. …
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A Few Possible Alternatives To Google Reader
I’ve never used Google Reader, but judging by stats here and the cries of horror online upon the announcement of it’s impending July 1st death, quite a few of you do/did. It sucks to lose a service that you’ve come to enjoy and rely on. That much I can relate to. So to hopefully help …
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Make Money, Live In Jail
Taking things back to a store is generally a pretty simple process. There are really only two things you need to remember to do: 1. Bring your receipt. 2. Leave the sheet full of counterfeit $100 bills you printed off just about anywhere but inside of the printer you’re trying to return. Jarad S. Carr …