Say what you want about cassettes. They’re easy to destroy. They don’t sound so hot once they start to wear. But for my money, there has never been a format that made audio more universally accessible. You could take your music anywhere, and you could capture anything you wanted quickly and with ease just by …
Author Archives: Steve Wettlaufer
Looks Like I’m An NDP Voter Again
Not because of any idea they have in particular although they generally have some pretty good ones. My choice is based on a really, really bad idea the Liberals had. I will absolutely not be rewarding this kind of selfish, irresponsible behaviour with my vote in September. Saying that, by the way, makes me a …
Eat It, Boneless Chicken Wings
I’m glad there are still folks out there who are willing to stand up and take on the big issues. Seriously, what the hell is a boneless chicken wing anyway? It really is just a damn nugget, and most of the time it’s not even a very good one. Thank you for speaking out, Andrew …
NirvanA.I
The guy who brought us “Nobody Died Every Single Day” A.K.A. the AI Nickelback song has given Nirvana the same treatment. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GogY7RQFFus I knew this was getting posted as soon as we hit the line about eating your heart-shaped box for food. Using lyrics.rip to scrape the Genius Lyrics Database, I made a Markov Chain …
Rudolph The Red Paint Reindeer
I get what they’re going for here, but wouldn’t spraying them with bright paint make them more visible to the bears and such that prey on them? It seems to me like modifying the roads in high deer areas might be a better, not to mention more efficient, way to go. Who wants to be …
Today In Because You Can Doesn’t Mean You Should: We Almost Had Cranberry Sauce And Mayo In The Same Jar
“I have a really terrible idea,” proclaimed Patrick Kelleher one day in 2008, “and I want everyone to know that its mine.” And so it came to pass that a patent application was filed and Cramonnaise came dangerously close to being born. Abstract Two popular food items, mayonnaise and cranberry sauce, are mixed together to …
I Scream, You Scream, Let’s All Scream About This Unnecessary Ice Cream Machine
And now, some more innovation I can’t imagine anyone asked for. Meet the ColdSnap, a machine that will transform pods made of lord only knows what (they don’t even need to be refrigerated) into ice cream in a minute and a half. I have so many questions. Mainly, why? Why do I need or want …
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It’s So Good To Finally Keep Doing What We Never Stopped Doing
ANOTHER DULL QUARANTINE WEEKEND AT HOME, TARGET, CHIPOTLE, HOME DEPOT, AND OUR NIECE’S GRADUATION PARTY This is one of those pieces that’s technically satire but is pretty much on the nose. All coronavirus long I’ve had to hear people bellyaching about how rough things have been, how little there is to do and how they …
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The Jays Have Real Radio Broadcasts Again
Sportsnet restores Ben Wagner as radio play-by-play voice of Blue Jays, for now Thank god. Dan Shulman did his best, but anyone with a clue knew that this simulcasting garbage was never going to work especially with him not calling every game. Buck is what he is, but what he clearly isn’t is a radio …
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Can I Get Me A Beer?
99 Bottles Of Beer On The Touch Screen: The Spread Of Self-Serve Taps As a blind person, I really hate this idea and hope it doesn’t find its way to Canada assuming it hasn’t already. Touchscreens are pretty much the bane of my existence. The damn things keep popping up in more and more places …