There’s nothing overly special about this story, aside from the fact that whomever the police ultimately pin the crime on will forever be known as the guy publicly masturbating in the parking lot of someplace called the Short Pump.
Category Archives: names
Black Friday Body Count: Sometimes The One Who Brings A Knife To A Gunfight Wins
Remember, it’s not just merchandise and a good spot in line that are worth fighting over on this most joyous of trumped up holidays. After all, if you can’t park, you can’t do either of those things. Sheriff Brian Hieatt tells WVVA it happened in the Walmart parking lot. He says two men, 61-year-old Ronnie …
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He Shoots, But If He Could Score He Wouldn’t Be Doing This Kind Of Thing
Ok seriously, what in the actual hell is going on here? Yesterday I mentioned the recent proliferation of tubesnake tales on the site, and woke up this morning thinking that maybe today would be a day where we could talk about something else for awhile. In an attempt to make that happen, I decided to …
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And With That, The Names Tag Has Peaked
When it comes to names in the news, I’m not sure it gets much better than this. He’s a church leader. He’s a convicted sex offender. I think that’s sort of redundant, but this isn’t about me. During his church days, He pretended to be an adolescent psychologist in order to get kids to talk …
What’s In A Name
Gill has written in again, but this time not with anything nearly as out there or controversial as last time. This time she’s talking about names. I’m not sure I entirely understand what her point is, but I also have a headache that’s making me feel a little dizzy and unfocussed this morning, so maybe …
Welcome To Brown Water Park
It looks as though another fellow has joined Luke Chrisco and Gary Moody in the caught covered in crap club. But at least Kenneth Webster Enlow tried to learn from the mistakes of those who had come before, offering up a much more creative explanation than I dropped something for why he was looking up …
If Only His Name Had Been Consensualer, Perhaps All Of This Could Have Been Avoided
Arrested last month and charged with multiple counts of sexually assaulting a person under the age of 13 was John Allan Raper.
Crank Is In The Tank, And She’s Got Crank To Thank
Recently arrested on charges of child endangerment and possession of methamphetamine is the most appropriately named person I’ve run across in some time, Zara Crank. Cpl. Jon Poletski said officers went to Shasta Regional Medical Center shortly before 5 a.m. to check out a reported child molestation. Poletski said Zara Crank, 22, had called 911 …
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The Old Vice-Mayor Just Ain’t What He Used To Be
Now that he’s no longer the Vice-Mayor of Mount Carmel, Tennessee, it’s only natural that William Blakely would want to find a new way to occupy his time. What’s not so natural or maybe a little too natural depending on your perspective is the pastime he apparently chose. According to police and a bunch of …
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Which Is It? Celebrity Baby Name Or Computer Virus
Here’s a fun little quiz to test your knowledge of celebrity children, computer viruses or in my case, neither. I only scored 45%, which says a lot about…something. I guess I shouldn’t feel too badly, though. The average is only 52%. CELEBRITY BABY NAME OR COMPUTER VIRUS?