This Story Doesn’t Hold Any Water

Ok, a while back, I read a story about a guy, Chad Hudgens, a member of a sales team, who was held down while his team leader poured water down his nose as part of some kind of team-building exercise where he urged the team to work as hard to sell as Hudgens had to …

The Victoria Lindsay Story Gets Weirder

Here’s a puzzler for you. Remember I talked about that kid who got the crap kicked out of her by 6 kids who then put the beating on YouTube? Well Apparently the kids bought her drinks and apologized for the beating before leaving her at the drugstore. What kind of freaky people would do that? …

You Are Getting Sleepy…Sleepy…And Stupid…

From the country that brought you legalized public sex in the park comes wackiness of such a degree that it has to be a product of all that legalized pot. Unemployed Dutch people are being forced to sign up for what is being called past-life therapy in the hopes that getting in touch with old …

There’s Always Time For Tim Hortons…To Shit All Over The Good Work Of Others

This,for lack of a better way to describe it, is fucking retarded. A small cafe set up in the Ottawa Hospital to help raise money to pay for new equipment has seen its revenue plummet ever since a Tim Hortons outlet opened up in the critical care wing of the same facility. Hospital officials say …

I’m Not Think You Who I Am

The following is a helpful tip from your friends at the Vomit Comet. If you’re going to go out drinking and need to use a fake ID, do your best to make sure that the guy you’re pretending to beisn’t wanted by the police for anything. Winona police were called to Brothers Bar, 129 W. …

This Story Has It All

This tiny news article is great for a number of reasons. There were legitimate fears that graffiti that has started appearing at a Florida school showing stick figures with giant peckers was the work of street gangs, because you know how those hoods and thugs love their penis jokes. Police have been called in more …

I’m Sorry, I Just Can’t Help Myself

Note to journalists everywhere: When writing a story about a guy with a long history of molesting folks on the subway, there’s got to be a better way to describe him than “the 6-foot, 227-pound Johnson”, even if Johnson does happen to be his name. Remember, people like me read these things, and people like …

Kids Are Going Down The YouTubes!

Let me get this straight. Victoria Lindsay had anger problems, she was known to mouth off, had fought with her parents and had moved in with a girl who became one of her attackers and was having problems with her, but it’s all YouTube’s and MySpace’s fault that she was beaten up by some girls …