Gees, we’re really dealing with a classy bunch. We have the Castellanos family, who came into the Paul Bunyan restaurant, and the burger he got seemed to be underdone and cold. When he asked for things to be fixed, he says the staff were rude, but they claim they were willing to reheat the burger, …
Category Archives: fuck fuckity fuck fuck ouch
Roscoe, No! That’s Not A Dog Bone!
This story of a dog gnawing off its owner’s toe is so great. First, there’s the idea that it happened. I guess Linda Floyd has no feeling in her feet due to diabetes, she had a hangnail, put a bandage on it, and went to sleep. AS she slept, dear little Roscoe the miniature dachshund …
Brings New Meaning To Trouser Snake, Doesn’t It?
Ouch ouch ouch ouch ouch ouch! I’m not a guy, but I can imagine getting bit on the end of your penis by a venomous snake can’t be pleasant. Oh ow ooo eee! The guy’s just lucky that somehow the snake didn’t fill him with venom, so he’s alive to remember the painful incident. I …
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A Prickly Situation
Why, oh why, oh why, would you run from police by rolling through cactus? Oh the pain! The pain! Surely, an arrest couldn’t be that bad! I guess the reason why he did it was stated in the article. “I am so stupid…” Yes, yes you are.
Ouch, My Nipples Hurt Thinking About That!
Note to anyone interested: Don’t go to Lubbock Airport if you have nipple rings. If you do, and they set off the metal detector, you have to remove them,even if it means using pliers to get them off. Shiver shiver shiver! What possible danger could a nipple ring pose? If they know it’s a nipple …
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Shockingly Stupid
Ok, who thought this idea would work? Can I zap them too? In Wales, there’s a woman who can’t stop calling 999 and uttering fake bomb threats and such. Thelma Dennis often does this when she is drinking. So, after 60 convictions, they decide to try a weird therapy on her. They tape electrodes to …
That Guy Needs A Hug
If you’re having a bad day, stop complaining and start counting your lucky stars that you’re notthis guy. And in case anybody is curious, this definitely falls well within the fuck fuckity fuck fuck ouch category.
You Live By The Sword…
Here’s today’s dose of fantastic irony. An un-named 26-year old man attempting to shoplift $300 worth of hunting knives from a Meijer store in Michigan got into a scuffle with security workers who tried to stop him, during which he fell and wasstabbed in the stomach by yes, you guessed it, the knives he was …
That Would Suck Ass!
*shiver* I’ll never think of pool drains the same way. Some of them have the power to suck your intestines through your ass? Ugugugug!
Gee, Those Don’t Look Like Stitches!
God. Now, if you have to go under the knife, along with all the usual worries, it seems that operating room fires happen more than one might think! Apparently this is because of the use of pure oxygen for the patient to breathe, use of alcohol swabs, and cauterizing instruments. Anyway, you’re more likely to …