Police: Drunk Woman Slept In Neighbor’s Home This story isn’t particularly funny, but posting it is a good excuse to tell one of my own that’s significantly better. In fact it’s one of my favourite stories to tell, but this is going to be my first crack at writing it down so I hope I …
Author Archives: Steve Wettlaufer
Now We Know Where The Ass In Embassy Comes From
The fairies at the Canadian Embassy in Washington have pathetically caved to thewhinging of the folks from Impératif Françaisand offered anapologyfor the poutine poster. Does it not strike anybody else as odd that nobody has bothered explaining for what it is that we’re supposed to feel so sorry? In my case it’s that my country …
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Hopefully They Have A Family Suite.
No officer, I didn’t report my son for driving around in your stolen cruiser. I just don’t see it as a big deal. What do you mean I can come with you? Police said that the 13-year-old boy was known to them and that he was a good kid until recently. They say that he …
Dear Impératif Français
Please, get a life. But before you go, please also explain to me what is so horribly offensive about a picture ofSamuel de Champlain eating poutine,and why people in English Canada would give even half a shit about a picture of one of our prominent figures doing the same to a hotdog. I’m sure a …
If I Said You Had A Beautiful Body, Would You Agree To Not Have Me Jailed?
Thanks to the Toronto Sun, we now know a lot more about the personification of the word douchebag that left the phone messages that I posted yesterday. He goes by the name Dimitri the Lover and has somehow managed to make a pretty successful racket out of giving love advice to men in the Toronto …
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This Would Be Right At Home In A Guelph Newspaper
Greenpeace Releases Dolphins Into ForestSounds like something our locally grown protesting knobs would do.
I Need No Title, This Speaks For Itself
Bush Tours America To Survey Damage Caused By His Disastrous Presidency
I’m Sure It Did, But Still…
30-Year-old Scott Mitchinson was tragically killed in a freak accident on June 19th. It is believed that he met his end when he stepped on an exposed electrical cable that had been obscured by flood water. Mitchinson’s father told the media when reached for comment that the news “came as a massive shock.” Wherever young …
I’m All Shook Up, Even Though It’s Mandated That I Be Less Shook Up To Prevent Illness
I hate ragging on the UK so much, but when I see things like this it’s hard not to. We can all agree that heart disease is a big problem, but be truthful, do any of you actually think that governmentsspending piles of money on new salt shakers that only have 5 holes instead of …
I Like You, So Here’s How This Works. I Find And Post, You Read And Enjoy. No Games Here
Thisis a poor way to approach just about anybody, especially when you hope to nail the person at some point. What a fucking dork.
