Warning! This Blog Contains Words!

Wow. I had to shake my head after reading this article. Police in Hertfordshire, who are obviously not Scotland Yard material, decided that a fine way to decrease crime in their area would be to post signs everywhere telling people not to commit crime. They also posted signs at gas stations saying that all fuel …

It’s a Dangerous School, But Not In The Way You’d Think

Wow. You know your school sucks when this shit starts happening. Apparently, Jamaica High School has such a bad record, being called a dangerous school, that staff were sent a memmo instructing them not to call 911. It stated that only the principal or assistant principal were allowed to do this. Fifteen days later, fourteen-year-old …

More ADA Guide Dog Goodness!

Oh boy. First I was mad because regular folk could pretend their pets were service animals, and now I find out we’re getting screwed over by blind people too! Are you confused? I was at first. This is how it went. A couple got guide dogs from Leader dogs, another guide dog school. They were …

Home Cosmetic Surgery?

Ok, explain this one to me. You decide you need cosmetic surgery. You find a couple who say they’ll do it for a reasonable rate. You are brought to their office and find that their office is actually a filthy house filled with drugs and syringes and four children running around in it and you …

Don’t Take that Born To Be Wild Thing Too Seriously There, Buddy!

Justin Patterson led police on a high-speed chase through two counties. Was he drunk? No. Did he have warrants? Nope. Why was he going so fast and driving like a complete moron? He was late for his test to get his motorcycle license. Well, after being charged with reckless driving, speeding 130 mph in a …

Let’s Go Down The Robbery Checklist

Hold-up note? Check.Hood? Check.Glasses? Check.Gloves so I won’t leave prints? Check.Bag for the money?Uh-oh! NEW HUDSON, Mich. (AP) – A bank teller apparently flustered a would-be bank robber – and foiled a robbery – after asking where the suspect’s bag was to carry off the money, authorities said. Oakland County Sheriff’s Detective Tom Bisio said …

No! I! Don’t! Speak! Spanish!

The images this story gives me make me laugh. Imagine a man going to Home Depot and standing at one of those self-checkout scanner thingies. The items he’s buying? A pry bar and a hacksaw. He’s waiting in line. When he finally gets to the scanner, he accidentally hits the button for Spanish on the …

The Stupidity Parade Marches On

Somebody, for reasons that I hope involve severe mental retardation, haspaid more than $1500for a piece of concrete with an oil stain on it that looks a little bit like the face of Jesus Christ. Speaking of Jesus Christ, that’s exactly what I said to myself when I watchedthis videoabout a Chinese grocery store that …