Horse Shit From A Different Direction

I wasn’t going to blog this, but it keeps calling me, begging to be mentioned.

There’s a group home that owns 3 acres of property within the city limits. They want to have two miniature horses for therapeutic purposes. But because of some neighbours being worried about potential problems, the horses have been removed because of a zoning bylaw.

Ok, the horses aren’t being kept in an apartment, they have a stable and a big area to run in. Their waste is being managed, and everything is being paid for by the home. They can’t get out to the neighbours. Why not wait and see if the animals are going to be a problem and then invoke the bylaw? They had already been brought onto the property before they were removed, so it’s not like removing them is a big hastle. God, some people are closed-minded and can’t take things on a case by case basis.

Maybe It’s Time To Make Some Room

Wow. I’ve bitched about people forgetting their kids in their cars before, but the story of Jennifer Carter loading them into the trunk because her car was too full of cargo to fit them where they should ride takes the cake.

Luckily, the kids weren’t hurt, and mommy dearest is being charged, but good lord. Here’s a tip for mommy dearest and others dumb enough to do this. Pack the things in the trunk and the people in the seats. Trunks are for things, seats are for people.

Sink Your Teeth Into This

I said a little while ago that we had too many creapy dentists. Well, we must, because a robo-dental patient has been created to be able to let a dental trainee know when something hurts. That’s cool. But, this female look-alike’s sensors include some on her breast area to detect if she has been touched inappropriately. Woe! This is such a problem that they have to screen it out in trainees? Yikes!

Three Wrongs Definitely Don’t Make A Right.

Wow. A few months ago, at Rhode Island Hospital, a neurosurgeon relied on his memory to know which side of a patient’s head had the problem and found out his memory wasn’t so good, and the patient died. Fast-forward to November, at the same hospital, when another neurosurgeon opens the wrong side of another patient’s head, and we learn that this latest case is the third case at this hospital in nine months, after a big review of their practices which happened after case no. 2 died. Um, yikes. I say again, if you need neurosurgery and you’re in the Rhode Island area, if you can avoid that hospital, do it!

This Beats The Donzer Song Any Day

Oh my. I wish something like that could happen with our national anthem. I’m trying to think of what words someone could fuck up to make something nearly this amusing. Hmmm. Anybody got any ideas?

Basically, Tony Henry, an English opera singer who spoke 0 Croatian, was askd to sing the Croatian national anthem at Wembley for a soccer game that decided who went on to the Euro 2008 games. But instead of singing a line that said “you know, my dear, how we love your mountains,” he sang “My dear, my penis is a mountain.” And all he did was put an r where a d should have been! Wow!

Damn! Can you imagine an opera singer belting that line out with all his might? Just envision him thinking about how he doesn’t know the words he’s singing, but this is their national anthem, so he has to make it sound like he’s just full, swelling, if you will, with mountainous…pride!

But here’s the cool part. The Croatians are not offended! They think of him as a lucky omen because his blunder made the players laugh, and then they won, edging England out of qualifying for the Euro 2008 games. Isn’t that just a kick in the, well, mountainous penis for Tony Henry?

I love his reaction. He’s all serious, apologizing if he offended the Croatians and talking about how he would never intentionally sing about his “parts” like that.

Man, some stuff is just funny as hell. I think we need to take a lesson from the Croatians, and if something laughable happens in our national anthem, we should just have a chuckle about it and let it go.

Stop In The Name Of The Anthem

Man, I’m all for patriotism, but having all traffic stop for the National anthem sounds like a recipe for disaster. Thank god, when someone proposed that bit of legislation in Thailand, someone else thought they should think about it for a while.

Imagine if you missed the memo? Then, after you smashed into your fellow motorist, would emergency vehicles have to stay stopped until the song was over? What if an ambulance was racing to save someone. Would they have to stay stopped? And even if they were given the ok to go ahead, they couldn’t move anyway with all the stopped motorists. Yeah, this is for the good of the country.

It’s A Real Cool Pub, And You’re Not Part Of It

Maybe I’m crazy, but the idea of a bar setting up a swipe card system to keep the crazy drunks out just sounds dumbest of dumb. But that’s what the Pelham Buckle in Britain is doing.

Here’s the first reason this just seems idiotic. How many times do people try out a new bar just for the hell of it? Isn’t it like shooting yourself in the foot to keep new people from finding your bar? Sure, some of them could be drunken fools, but some of them might become regulars. The way it’s set up now, you have to hope none of your regulars move, or die, or get pissed off at the way things are run and stop coming.

Second, what if one of your regulars becomes a crazy drunk? What if one day, he has a really shitty run of luck, he goes to your bar to drown his sorrows, and goes nuts? Are you going to have to change the card and reissue them to everyone but him? Good people can go bad.

Third, how does a customber become a regular? What if they are a perfectly good guy, but only go there sometimes? Is it *clang* no booze for them because they don’t go there more than once a week?

And here’s the final stupidity. More pubs are looking at this system as a solution to keep out the roudies. I think they’d better change their name from pub to something else, because doesn’t “pub” signify public? This isn’t so public anymore. I guess they’d be privs then?

Special Water For Woofer

Good lord this is stupid. Some people are throwing money away buying bottled water. Now, they can throw money away buying bottled water for their pets!

The company, Aquience, says that all pets, but particularly cats, aren’t getting enough liquid in their diet, and are getting urinary disorders. So they decided to sell bottled water just for the furry members of the household. What makes the water marketed to them? Aquience put what they called natural attractant in the bottled water, so the pets will drink more of it. So instead of giving them just regular water, you can give them water laced with something to make it taste like meat, so they can drink more of it, so along with the water, they can get more of this weird syntho-meat crap. Yeah, I don’t think their aim is really to get animals to drink more water for the sake of their health. They’re just trying to get in on the ridiculousness that is the bottled water market. But people will buy silly things for their pets, so I’ll bet it’ll sell like crazy.

Bad Taste Moved Here

Well, it’s official. We can get KFC failure piles in sad bowls in Canada now, but instead of “famous bowls”, they’re calling them “chicken bowls”. I still look at that and go blech! But I’m curious as to why they’re selling so well. Anybody know? I don’t think I’m brave enough to try one.

And does anyone else notice that the slogan for KFC has changed from “big taste lives here” to “taste lives here”? What? What does that even mean? It’s amazing that they managed to take a dumb slogan and turn it even dumber. What kind of taste lives here. We’ll never know. Now that I think about it, judging from these bowls, I think we do.