Put This Idea In The Can And Don’t Even Think Of Looking In Mine

So a suicide bomber blew himself up and the bomb was in his rectum. Now airlines folks are trying to figure out how to check for…bum-bombs? Don’t even start. Just don’t. Just think of what agents could do to us because of this. They say the x-ray scan machines would do it, but just ask …

I Don’t Know What The Grades Were, But this Last Act Was A Fail

Here comes another fake kidnapping. this one was an 11-year-old boy trying to get out of telling mom and pop about bad grades. He said that some random guy grabbed him and said he was going to take him somewhere and kill him. But he got away…and happened to grab his band instrument, but not …

FOUR!…Thousand Pieces Of Litter In The Park

You’d think there would have to be a better way to pay tribute to dead golfers than tossing over 3000 golf balls into the Joshua Tree National Park from your car over a 2 year period, but you’d likely be thinking that because you aren’t57-year-old Douglas Jones who is facing jail time for doing that …

I Had No Idea Those City Holiday Parties Were So Crazy

Well, I suppose that if mystery marijuana is going to show up anywhere,High Streetwould probably be the most likely place. If these plants ended up in the city-owned basket any way other than some kind of mistake in a flower order, police should have no trouble catching a suspect. Seriously, how fast could a person …

That’s Not A Ramp For Scooters!

Wow. that’s some crazy drunkenness. Daniel Samplanski got so drunk that he didn’t even realize he was on the freeway! And why did he borrow his neighbour’s electric scooter? This was apparently his fifth drunk driving charge. Watch this chopped up video. Does he look pretty toasted? This brings me to a weird question. What …

A Penny Flattened Is A Woman In A Train Accident

And now it’s time for another healthy living public service message from your friends at Vomit Comet. When trying to flatten pennies on a railroad track, always do your best toget out of the way *before* the train gets to the coin. The report says that the unidentified woman in this case suffered a head …

Salvation Army Brats

It looks like Gloria Ballard has caught Roger Stephens Disease, and I think it’s in a far more severe form than what Stephens himself exhibits. She grabbed a two-year-old who was annoying her somehow, put him over her knee and smacked him 3 times. Then, in court, she tried to claim she gently hugged him …

Matthew Don Can’t Read

Hey there Matthew Don Reed. Here’s a tip. the governor would not be caught dead writing a letter to a job applicant that read: It’s nice to have you as an employee of West Virginia,. Your super (boss) Matt talk a lot of thangs about you. I hope you stay with us a long time. …

What We Learned On Our Journey To VC Version 2.0

Woohoo! Why am I cheering? Because most of our work to update our blog and bring it into the present is over! Yeah! Actually, all the work on the current stuff is done. Now there are just things we want to do. And no blog posts were harmed in the implementing of this new design. …