Wow. This sounds like a joke. It just can’t be true. But if it is, that’s a sixteenth birthday that poor boy won’t forget. His mom, for some unknown reason, decided to have a man in a gorilla suit show up to his drama class for his sixteenth birthday. But when she bookd it, she …
Category Archives: news
Gee, Those Don’t Look Like Stitches!
God. Now, if you have to go under the knife, along with all the usual worries, it seems that operating room fires happen more than one might think! Apparently this is because of the use of pure oxygen for the patient to breathe, use of alcohol swabs, and cauterizing instruments. Anyway, you’re more likely to …
Babble Fish
Wow, Babelfish took a dignified set of questions and turned them, well, into Vogon poetry. A bunch of Israeli journalists were going to go over to Holland and attend a seminar on the Dutch political system. They were asked to send a list of their questions. The leader of the deligation was away on some …
Which Is Lower, The Temperature Or Your IQ?
The Cool Cash lottery game has been pulled from stores in the UK after a number of complaints from angry customers whofailed to grasp how it worked. The game, unveiled late last month, required players to scratch off a window to reveal a temperature. If that temperature was lower than another figure shown on the …
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So We Have Dog Racists Now?
Man oh man. This makes me sad. People, when they’re thinking about adopting a dog, don’t take the black ones. Why? Because they’re always the bad dogs in movies, or they don’t stand out in pictures. Boo friggin hoo. If you mistreat your white dog, it will get bad. And I can’t count the number …
Cookie Battery
Ok, a drug deal goes bad, so the guys start torturing the guy who was supposed to hand over the cash. they hit him with a paddle, shave his hair, throw urine on him, and burn him with hot cookies? What the? If he paid up, would they have given him some? Since when did …
>Thanks, That Really Narrows It Down.
>This story isn’t all that special, except for the oh so helpful description provided by police. He is described as white with defined facial features and acne marks on his face. He is between 17-24 years old, stands about 6 feet tall and weighs about 170 pounds. Defined facial features? What does that even mean? …
>Does He Have A Death Wish?
>One of these days, Jackie Bibby is gonna die. Why? Because he has a thing for setting records with rattlesnakes. Crawling into sleeping bags with them, holding them by their tails in his mouth, sitting in tubs with them. Look, dude, you have a zillion world records. Quit while you’re ahead…and still alive!
So This Is What A girl’s Innocence Is Worth?
Ok, so a bunch of boys can force a girl to have oral sex with them, piss on her, set her hair on fire, tape the whole thing and distribute it, and only get probation and rehab? Oh, and this isn’t the first time these boys have done similar things? Riiiiight! I hate stories like …
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In Scotland, They Don’t Screw Around!
Wow! Years ago, in Scotland, there must have been a lot of sex-offenders who weren’t caught before they did something ghastly horrible. Why else would they throw people on the registry for screwing a bike, and now getting it on with pavement. At least this one, I can half understand because it was in full …
