That’s Definitely A Cool Cat Now

Ok, what the hell? First we had a burglar putting a dog in the oven, now we have a cat in the freezer. these sick freaks seemed to be more into causing damage and pain than robbing the guy, but what is with pets being put inside appliances lately? Thankfully, this time the cat was …

I Am In Canada, Right? And It’s 2009, Yes?

What the hell country does Sid Ryan think he’s living in? Somebody tell him that it’s Canada, and Canada doesn’t usually tell people what to say, what to think. although we fail sometimes, we do like our free speech. Somebody tell him that this proposal ordering members of CUPE to boycott Israeli academics who don’t …

What Doesn’t Kill You, We’ll Lend A Hand To

Here’s another one of those activist logic things I need explained to me, because I’m just not gettin’ it. Over the last few months, somebody has beenblowing up sour gas pipelines belonging to the EnCana Corporationin British Columbia. It is widely believed that the bombings are linked to a threatening letter sent to an area …

>Traumatic Insemination Indeed!

>Reading this makes me very very very happy I’m not a female squid. Eek! What a way to screw. But there’s one major flaw I see in this theory. If squid always lived in the deep ocean, then why would they need to see? Shouldn’t they have evolved other ways of sensing what those who …

He Can’t Have His Hitler Cake Or Eat It Either

How the hell can Heath Campbell not think he’s screwing up his kids? He has saddled his oldest child with the name Adolph Hitler Campbell, his middle child is named JoyceLynn Aryan Nation Campbell, and his youngest is named Honszlynn Hinler Jeannie Campbell. Then he’s shocked when he can’t get cakes with these names inscribed …

I Missed the Bus, So Drove The Car, Then Smashed The Car, And That Is Somethin’ That I’ll Never Ever Ever Do Again!

This poor little guy is a very lucky little boy. Ya gotta give the little guy credit for determination to see a goal through to the end, even though that determination didn’t, uh, have a happy ending. He missed the bus, and felt so bad about it that he decided to try and drive the …

I’ve Got Such A Woody Right Now…A Woody And A Few Slivers…

It’s a new year, and that can mean only one thing. That’s right, new stories about people humping things! First up (see what I did there?) for 2009 is Jose Raul Moreno-Lopez of Tampa, Florida. Unless somebody has come up with the $7750 required to spring him, he is currently sitting in the Orient Road …

Smile, You’re On Candid Bedroom Camera

Here’s a note to women everywhere. I wouldn’t live with Jeffrey Tigges if I were you. He thinks that you have no reasonable expectation of privacy in your own home if you live with him. He videotaped his wife and got caught, and that was his defense in court. Thankfully, it didn’t fly. What I …